How to create sustainable Value to your Relationships: Try these 5 proven and powerful Mindsets.

How you  can add sustainable value to your relationships:

  • You can listen and observe then provide feedback
  • If asked you can offer valuable insights and provide solutions to pain or problems.
  • You can ask challenging and profound questions that stimulate thoughtfulness and creativity
  • You can show people how to make or save relationships and maximize possibilities.
  • Build trust by giving credit away and providing a win for others.

These techniques are seen as helpful by most people. Just keep them in balance to develop long-term impact.

Blanche Lincoln needs to go–“Tell her don’t ask”

Newsflash–Blanche Lincoln just committed career suicide. It’s not enough that she was against the Public Option and a progressive voice for HC reform. She now is against eliminating “Don’t Ask Don’t tell” for gays in the military.  This was her second big opportunity to show she supports change and represents the voters of Arkansas –she failed.

Lincoln was a critic of the public option, backed the Baucus bill in the Finance Committee, and lobbied not even to put the “Public Option” on the table for discussion. So after this wrong headed position what does she do but vote against even discussing the “Don’t ask, Don’t Tell” amendment.   She is not a leader who is championing change or even compromise. She has taken up the banner of fear and  no change of the republican party. Maybe she needs some time off to figure out who she was sent to represent and how to get things done that will improve the quality of life for her constituents and the American people. Maybe we all need to become more effective advocates for change. Let her know you thoughts and ideas for change by calling or e-mailing her office today:

1-202-224-4843 or e-mail her

BEST Companies to work for :Whole Foods from Hippyville to Customer and Employee Centered

If you are a committed and a determined to change some specific behavior or situation in your life, remember the quality of your life has nothing to do with excuses, unresolved conflicts, or  negative experiences. It has everything to do with the HERE AND NOW–YOU. YOUR ESSENCE AND PASSION FOR LIVING A MEANINGFUL, CONTROLLABLE and CONSTRUCTIVE LIFE. It has to do with your thinking, reflection, choice, behavior, and impact–The pressing question: What do you want to change and how do you go about sustaining that change in finding  the right place to work and life?

Maybe Whole Foods is the place for you. Checkout their openings, workplace climate and interviewing tips at

Whole Foods ranked 18th in the BEST Companies to work for by Fortune magazine.Whole Foods is fast growing with over 270 retail and non-retail locations and presently 1600 job openings in the US, Canada and UK. Their motto and mission are inspiring and captivating. Their approach to business is about making a difference — in the lives of our Team Members and the customers they serve, and in the communities in which they operate. Whole Foods Market is the world’s leading natural and organic foods supermarket retailer. Their philosophy is to satisfy and delight customers — and to support Team Member happiness and excellence. Why? Because they believe and operate on the principle of equality and fairness which means each and every team member is a valued contributor.

They look to recruit passionate people who are passionate about food and can function as member of  motivate and customer service teams. The employee teams are focused on excellence in everything they do. They empower team members to make their own decisions, creating a respectful workplace where people are treated fairly and are highly motivated to succeed.

If the above  words don’t inspire you to look into job with Whole Foods. Go talk to a few team members who will tell you the company “walks the talk” in regard to treating people with respect and dignity.  Remember in job hunting it is your persistence and PASSION that can separate you from the average Joe or Jane looking for a job. If this one doesn’t work for you take a look at the other BEST 100 Companies to work for. Good Luck and stay in the game.

Biting the Hand that Feeds You–Failed Leadership

Inaccurate thinking and loss of emotional control can cost you, your employees and especially customers.

Here is the story. At a nationwide upscale retail store the policy for discounts which was communicated to employees was simple. If a customer wanted to buy a floor model they received a 10% discount.

On a recent Sunday morning, a husband and wife enter the store and were greeted by a sale associate. Asked if they needed help they point to the display window and asked if  the copper Kitchen Aid mixer which cost $800+ was in stock. After checking the sales rep reported there were none in stock but they had three options : 1. order the mixer on line and the shipping would be waived. 2. The sales associate would check with near by stores to see if one was available. 3. They could purchase the floor model for 10% discount. They choose option three. Before the sales associate went for a box the wife pointed out what she believed was a scratch. The sales associate agreed and said that’s why floor models were discounted. So far so good the sale was on track. (Oh, by the way the store has not sold one of these copper Kitchen Aid mixers in four years.) Then enter the male “alpha” store manager who had found a box and over heard the comment about a scratch which he told the sales associate in the back room was not true. The customer who was waiting outside the door over heard the manager’s comments and yell into the back that yes it was scratched and he would show him the scratch.  The manager stormed out of the room to confront the customer and an alpha male battle over who was right proceeded.  The customer took offense and disagreed with the manager and ended up saying–never mind I will order it online and turned on his heels to leave the store.  The employee was embarrassed and apoligized . The cutomer said not to worry because it wasn’t her fault. Did the manger try to recovery wth the customer? No. He said to the confused and embarrassed sales associate that this incident was not her fault.

What was the impact of this loss of emotional control?  The customer left unhappy and according to research will tell at least twenty other people of their poor treatment at the store.  The sales associate was confused about the policy of floor discounts and embarrassed about the lack of support and empowerment. And the sale was not made. What lessons can other leaders or managers take away from this story?

1. Take the time to see the interaction from the salesperson’s or the customer’s point of view. 2. Don’t try to win at any cost. 3. Making the customer wrong creates a lose-lose situation for all involved.

 Will this bad event happen again? Yes, if the manager does not recognize a simple fact of customer serice –The customer is always right and you never win an argument or get a sale by fighting with people who have choices. For this reason many consultants and therapists–beginning with Freud–have clients create a ‘mimesis’ — meaning they role-play the situation from the offending party’s perspective. The hope is that, through this training and role-playing, managers and employees might better understand why someone might want to emotionally take a bite out of them when they are attacked for being wrong, if they listen and learn the lesson in maybe can avoid being bitten again!

Your Assignment: If you’ve been caught between an irrational manager or customer by being yelled at– or experienced any other kind of impulsive emotionally bulling— take the time today to try to see things from a ‘Customer’s Point of View’ so you can perhaps avoid being stupid, rejected or yelled at again. Plus this exercise will help you lessen the built up anger in your life. Good Luck.