Want to Connect with Others? Try Eliminating this Bad Communication Habit

Daily Quote: You cannot truly listen to anyone and do anything else at the same time. Dr. M. Scott Peck, Road Less Traveled

First act of Love is Listening – Dr. Carl Rogers 

“By consistently listening to others you are conveying the idea that: “I’m interested in you as a person, and I think that what you feel is important. I respect your thoughts, and even if I don’t agree with them, I know that they are valid for you. I feel sure that you have a contribution to make. I’m not trying to change you or evaluate you. I just want to understand you. I think you’re worth listening to,and I want you to know that I’m the kind of a person you can talk to.”

The subtle but more important aspect of active listening is that it is the demonstration of the message that works.
While it is most difficult to convince someone that you respect him by telling him so, you are much more
likely to get this message across by really behaving that way—by actually having and demonstrating respect for this person. Listening does this most effectively. one can learn that listening can be met with listening. Every person who feels
responsibility in a situation can set the tone of the interaction, and the important lesson in this is that any
behavior exhibited by one person will eventually be responded to with similar behavior in the other
person.”

Reflection:  Do you remember my post on the third ear entitled–Third Ear: Active Listening Techniques for Connecting with Others ?  Talk about disrespecting others I noticed a significant new distracting habit recently at a graduation party. People gathered around with drink in one hand and smart phone  in the other. You get the visual.  You can’t connect with others by half listening to them. Zoning out during a conversation by checking your email or taking a phone call is rude. You may think you’re being stealth, but the other person can almost always tell and it sends a message that they’re unimportant and not worth listening to. On the other hand, giving a friend, client, or colleague your full attention signals that you really care about others what they are trying to communicate. Futher more it is the polite and respectful way to say you are my top priority right here, right now.

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