Poem–Noise of Self-Deception and Fear

Noise of Self-Deception and Fear by MW Hardwick

Darkness surrounds me on the run home

And I can feel the chill and icy rain

As my feet slip on the fallen leaves.

My breath is visible in the street light.

Then I stop to catch it…

And wonder what is the fear welling up in me…

Can I out run this?  or do I need to just face what I am fearing?

Anxiety is not a friend or foe but where does it come from–

Is this reality or just something made-up in my mind?

I start to sing to over ride this stuff and my comfort is growing stronger.

My feet and legs move quicker and my heart beat finds a rhythm

So I know longer out running my breath…

I come upon the candy store dart in for a respite

I am half way home…

The owner looks at my rain-soaked jacket

And asks if I want to sit by the fire  crackling behind him?

Is this the fear I anticipated? Am I in jeopardy or am I just reading the situation wrong?

I trust my judgment and say no

Pick up a “cheery hump bar” and say good-bye and plunge back into the darkness…

I now realize that only my mind can produce fear…

So I continue my journey home…counting the blocks to my house…

And focusing on my breathe and flow of my run

Opening the door and smelling the wonderful flavors of the evening meal..

I am safely home and well beyond the darkness and shadows of fear…

And self-deception…the noise of fear gone…

I sit straight in my bed and wonder what a dream…what a dream

A dream I rather forget…forget… forget…


One thought on “Poem–Noise of Self-Deception and Fear”

  1. Reblogged this on The Wick and commented:

    In case you missed my run home here it is again…Maybe I should change the title to the Zen of Running

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