New Poem: Alone… with Secrets,Demons and Dreams

Alone… with Secrets, Demons and Dreams —by MW Hardwick 

Things get hectic and complicate as soon as humans enter the equation

Are they laughing at me or wanting do me harm

Am I just “making shit-up” or is this real?

Yelling at myself stop…stop… stop…leave me alone

And yet thoughts seem to overwhelm and overlap in my brain like crashing waves

No space for rational ideas…or calm

I rush deeper down and further inside.

My fears mount and I battle the panic–

But comfort and peace do not COME

Sweat pours down my face and tears well-up

It reminds me of other times when confusion struck

And I barely hung on…

Please- no more talking, hospitals or self-imposed jails…

Is there a conspiracy to harm me or what?

What in the world have I done OMG…OMG

Maybe I need to ask for forgiveness–but what for?

But inside I am melting down…

Do you hear my cries for help?

Take a breath–breathe deeply exhale  slowly…  smile…

And slowly count One, two,three, 4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,12,13,14,15,16,17,18,19

Twenty–they told me this always works to center yourself but where is the calmness?

Then the phone rings…rings and rings and I stop

So I now need to talk but I am uneasy, guarded and careful

Will I  just fill the airwaves with Blah, Blah, Blah

I am not clear on how idle chit-chat leads

Could this be someone calling about what I am thinking…

Nonsense just pick it up and listen to who it is and what they want…

Thank goodness it’s you

We talk about my fears, reality and crossed wires

I take three more deep breaths and realize it’s time for darkness and my dreams…

And friends…alone …alone

Oh, the battle to stay grounded and to see and think clearly

Maybe rest will give me respite

From these fears…oh so many fears…

I glance at the mirror and my face sternly looks back and says

YOU TELL ME YOUR FEARS AND SECRETS and I WILL TELL YOU MINE…

I guess it’s time to dream about eating lemon squares…and cinnamon rolls…

And making this sad world a paradise…a paradise…so we all can be happy again

Say goodnight to Secrets, Demons and Dreams…Alone at last…

ALONE AT LAST…alone at last… 

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2 thoughts on “New Poem: Alone… with Secrets,Demons and Dreams”

  1. Sounds like somebody is held hostage in their own life! Dad, I like the poem, I would include more imagery, so I can get a feel of where I am. Is he in a foreign country or just as a metaphor? About to go jogging, saw Barcelona tie Atheletico Madrid on my new soccer channel, it was a game between two heavyweights. Also, I looked up soccer coaching and their actually is a lot of hiring for college assistants, I am going to look into it further. The internet is great, by the way. —–Todd

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