Eleanor Roosevelt once said, “You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face…You must do the thing you think you cannot do.”

 1. Battle your fear of speaking by being thoroughly prepared. Know your material and trust your ability to communicate it to the audience. In addition, take the time to practice and get feedback on the presentation. As Aristotle once said “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence is not an act but a habit”. You have a captive audience so take advantage and deliver a powerful and meaningful speech. 

 2. Act Natural and be authentic. Leave audience wanting more and with a positive impression of your flexibility, openness and responsiveness to their concerns and needs. Remember the audience is on your side they want you to succeed.  

 3. Present things aligned with who you are what you do well; don’t try to fake it or “make stuff up” MSU’s are out. 

4. Don’t gesture for the sake of gesturing.  There must be a reason for your gestures and they need to connect to what you are saying.

 5. Show the private person who is relaxed and confident in conversations. Bring that same confident style to the public stage. Start with high energy and get to the point and close with enthusiasm. 

6. Bring relevance, assurance, tangibility, empathy and responsiveness to the presentation. (RATER)

 As a speaker and communicator, you are the one who is shooting the “free throw to win” the game. You’ve got to stick it to win. You must have more than good intentions to make the shot.  Every single day, you are delivering messages and trying  to make ideas stick and persuade others to change or behave in a certain way.  So how do you connect with and make the message stick? Trying using the RATER:  

• RESPONSIVE-challenge your audience with something new or ideas they can use. Be responsive to their interest and needs. Answer questions as they are asked. Do not put people off by saying, “ I will answer it later”. Be “quick on your feet” adapt to audience interest and needs. If you are not sure you are meeting their expectations ask them. For example, how are we doing here? I this information meeting your expectations? If not change directions. Don’t ignore the disinterested looks or signs of boredom.   
• ASSURANCE- provide credible information and examples of idea or solution benefits and how it has worked in the past. Use powerful examples and stories to reinforce credibility.
• TANGIBLES--bring concrete ideas and provide pragmatic examples or                        metaphors that make the ideas less abstract. Avoid generalizations and professional jargon. Make message clear, concise and compelling.
•  EMPATHY-Show the audience that you care and understand their problems, skepticism, views  and ideas 
•  RELEVANT  information-present solutions and ideas with confidence and supportive evidence and testimonials supporting credibility and viability of  ideas   

“There’s something I know about you that you may or may not know about yourself. You have within you more resources of energy than have ever been tapped, more talent than has ever been exploited, more strength than has ever been tested, more to give than you have ever given”.  - John Gardner, Author Self-Renewal  

When I was coach of a middle school basketball team, one of our fundamental team principles was to focus on the basics of basketball: learn to dribble with your head up, shoot with both hands, move your feet on defense, talk to each other, and practice these techniques outside of practice. To my surprise one day after practice a player approached me and said: coach, if I am to practice at home, can you show me how to shoot? I certainly was taken back a step or two  but I immediately went into action.   I reflected on his request and realized where I had gone amiss was to assume everyone could shoot. What an oversight and bad assumption. The next practice I remedied the error by reviewing the fundamentals of shooting and demonstrated first hand the basic techniques to good  shooting.

What does basketball fundamentals have to do with self-renewal? Many individuals in search of connecting with others seldom question or reflect on their assumptions and beliefs about themselves, their strengths and other people’s needs. So, in the end, we limit our opportunities, choices, and, therefore, our capacity to make a difference.

In my own executive career coaching experience, I had client who wanted to become a drug and rehabilitation counselor and some day become a licenced psychologist and have his own private practice. The moment we started talking about how to pursue his dream, a very negative image about what his dad would say caused him to discard his interests and the possibilities of this type of career. He said, “My Dad says, “ counselors are okay if you are weak and not able to make your own way and they make very little financially, you would be better off becoming a lawyer or business guy”. He added, “yet all the lawyers I have talked to, including my Dad don’t seem to enjoy their work.”

Giving up your dreams and “playing it safe” or fulfill someone’s expectations for you is an easy way out,” I replied. “It is low risk, convenient, safe, and it will please your Dad.  Most of us live our lives in a “not to lose” way in order to please others and take little risk while preserving the status quo. The boring and non-fulfilling life has become the “way it is” because most people live this way. We make up excuses and just don’t think that there is any choice. We don’t even think to dream big, let alone act on it. We sort of just end doing what we are doing. Many people “sleep walk” through life. Their vision of a fulfilling and exciting work life seems to be out of their reach so they just accept what their doing even if it isn’t rewarding. They’re not stifling their dreams; they don’t even realize they can dream.

The key error in my client’s mind is that there are plenty of people who actually work in the counseling field, love their work, and find it very fulfilling.  Here are five simple tips to help you avoid “playing not to lose” and how to develop or reset your life by “playing to win” so as find  and live a life that you are truly passionate about:

1. Vision and Dream Setting:– Reflect on times when you have “Played to Win”. When you give 110% and embraced the possibility of greatness.

Think back over life to times when you’ve felt yourself unquestionably going for greatness, following your passions and succeeding beyond expectations.  What did that feel like? What did you think? What did you do? What happened because of your actions? How can you recreate that experience in your life now?

2. Live Each Day Without Limitations

Each and every day make sure you update your mental maps and do something to challenge the hum-drum of the status quo.  Make learning and  “self-development” and your strengths and passions a priority. Do one new thing each day. Have new experiences, open your mind to new connections and ideas and begin to do things that ignite your passion for life.

3. Reinforce Strengths by eliminating the “Energy Drainers”

Having negative energies in our lives can easily bring us down and encourage further feelings of depression. We have all encountered “energy drainers” at home,  social and, worst of all, workplace interactions that are filled with emotionally damaging interactions that impact our zest for life. We feel stuck, upset and impotent to handle these recurring situations.  Take notice of these interactions –what was the situation, who was involved, and how did you handle the situation. Reflect and ask yourself how you good of done different things to change the interaction from a negative experience to a more positive one. Try to find positive solutions in order to change your negative reactions. Take time to stop repeating old patterns of interaction and replace them with positive energy resources.  Talk to uplifting people, read inspiring poems and on a daily basis reflect on quotes to eliminate stress and renew positive thoughts and energy. Plant a garden, ride your bike take a hike, play some tennis, or anything you enjoy which renews positive energy. Be clear on your moment objectives, accept your feelings and do what you need to do to restore balance and positive energy in your life. Remember to do something great takes more than desire and dreaming. It takes positive and concrete action.  

4. Develop and create a strong sense of worth and love for who you are.

What are your strengths and weaknesses? What are your needs and wants? What are your likes and dislikes? How in touch are you with your emotions  and feelings? Do you let your emotions overwhelm you or do you accept them and move on? Can you enjoy life in the “here and now” moment or are you always looking backwards or toward the future? What is your opinion on politics, religion, or life philosophy? Do you simply pick up the opinion of talk radio or cable and go with the crowd? Or do you truly know what you value and are willing to fight for? Do you make time to reflect and listen to feedback of your impact on others?  Do you self-disclose to others who you really are? Do you explore your need to update your mental maps and point of views? Answering these questions honestly will give you a good sense of what you want  in life and will increase your opportunities for living a good quality of life.

5. Create an “Meaning and fulfillment Journal”– Take Notice Each Day Of What You Love to do and don’t like to do

Take some time each day to tune into your inner voice. Listen to what resonates with you and what you truly enjoy. What excites you most about your potential dream job or the job you already have? Make it a morning or evening ritual to take 15 minutes to have some personal quiet time and really take stock of what turns your inner light on.

By learning and applying these techniques on a regular basis your awareness of when you’re “playing to lose” will greatly increase, empowering you to refocus on “ playing to win” doing the best you can with what you have. Greatness and renewal do not just magically appear. You need to accept yourself and do what you have to do to bring greatness into your life. Remember, you will become as dull as your unfulfilled dreams and only as great as your willingness to live your dreams. Renewing your dreams and desires is just the starting place. Get out of your head and get started on the new life you want to create.

AHA PRESENTATION final 2 april 30 09

 Not only is there an art in knowing a thing, but also a certain art in teaching it.” Cicero

Introduction

The secret to successful and impactful speaking is self-confidence.  The elements that cause most of our confusion about this concept in knowing what self-confidence is, what it is not and how it impacts our speaking performance.What Is It?

Daniel Goldman, author of the international best seller Emotional Intelligence says that self-confidence is a strong sense of one’s self-worth and capabilities.  Self-confidence in any arena of life is a reality-based feeling or attitude that you can meet and fulfill the expectations and challenges presented.  Self-confidence seems to be rooted in competence, adequacy and positive life experiences.  The self-confident person has a sense of personal control and inner directness.  They have a strong belief in their abilities and few self doubts or fears.  The confident person believes in their ability to change, learn and grow.

They are open to new ideas, observant of surroundings, aware of weaknesses, and assertive in conflict.  They project assurance (thoughtfulness and decisive behaviors) and empathy for others.

What it is not?

Self-confidence is not arrogance, cockiness, defensiveness, pretenses or denials.  It is not an over the top I am always right attitude.  It is not condensation toward others.  It can appear as unrealistic grandiosity if reality and the current situation are ignored.

How anxiety and nervousness impacts speaking performance?

Too much anxiety creates the cycle of self-doubt and interference.  Some of the interferences are mind going blank, shaky voice, talking too fast darting and wandering eyes and above all else poor perfeormance.  Causes—self-doubt, interference and poor performance.

Many of us are aware that we are own worst enemy and that we have a tendency to get in our own way when speaking.  How does this phenomenon work?  It works as any human action works through the natural perception cycle of—perception, response and results triangle.  Take for example, the action of catching a baseball.  The player sees the image of a ball coming toward him, then responds by moving his body and glove into position and then catches the ball producing the results of the action.  This chain reaction of events can be either a positive or negative self-fulfilling prophecy (SFP).  The SFP is started by a false belief (I can’t speak very well)and becomes fulfilled by action that supports that original belief.

 The first advice I give to people who want to improve their presentation skills is, “Don’t fight the feeling of being nervous!” Feeling nervous is normal course of events with any type of performance activity.  If a situation is seen as threat our unconscious mind goes to work in pumping adrenaline into our brain. This adrenaline does us that we need to fight or take flight.  Nearly every speaker, including the professionals, has that feeling before getting up in front of an audience.

The difference is that extraordinary speakers give that feeling a different name: they see it as excitement or “aliveness.or positive energy to help get them going. It’s a feeling that lets you know that you’re about to do something exciting and the outcome is important to you.

So the next time you feel nervous before a speech or presentation, welcome that feeling and say to yourself, “thank you for the reminder . . . I’m glad I’m feeling this way!” When I don’t have that feeling, my speech is likely to be flat and I have to work much harder to deliver an engaging presentation.

Formula for Masterful Presentations–make your message believable, clear and concise. I am including a powerpoint presentation to help you get started

 Know thy Self—Information + Insight = Self-Knowledge

1. Focus on developing natural strengths
2. Be a teacher not a performer—this is a person-to-person art; the heart of presenting and speaking persuasively is in essence the act of caring.  People want you to succeed as a speaker.  So help people by providing new information, techniques or insights and they will want to help you.
3. Fake it till you—make it
4. Be enthusiastic and passionate about your topic and ideas.  Ask the question—Does this speech have a SOO a significant overriding objective.  How can I make the point stick and make it easy to understand and useful?
5. Take a positive “visualization trip” let your imagination run freely for 5-10 minutes. See yourself succeeding and audience clapping.
6. Risk self-disclosing by telling stories and providing examples from your life
7. The best teacher for learning presentations is presenting or speaking itself.  When combined with specific model and meaningful feedback “practice can make perfect”.
8. Make message concise focus on the 20% that can make a difference and leave the fluff homeChallenge your self by presenting concepts that follow the 80/20 rule.

• Stop-Think Smart-Choose technique—that says that 80% of your results come from 20% of your efforts.  Try to figure out what priorities you want to spend your time and energy on—your 20%;  then choose at least three HIGH PAYOFF PRESENTATION PRIORITIES.
•  9.  Learn to Relax—Use that shot of adrenaline to eliminate self-doubt, judgment and need   to be perfect. Focus on the audience not your nervousness. Take a deep breath and then begin. Take a look at the Masterful Presentation-The Aha Approach to get more info. and tips how how to connect and send a powerful message.

“When everyone in an organization accepts responsibility, shows respect and holds each other accountable to do the right thing through caring confrontation, everyone wins.” Gus Blanchard

One of the most overwhelming negative feelings a person can have is that of being put-down and shunned. The outsider feels alienated and lonely, not being accepted, loved, or respected by others. Such mental maps and feelings can have a major effect on the way a person views the worth of their lives and how they interact with their culture and fellow citizens. Let’s look at two recent mass shootings– Walter Reed-Fort Hood and Columbine. It all started for Maj. Nidal Malik at Walter Reed Army hospital in Washington,D.C.  He had difficulty making friends. The doctor seemed aloof and distant said one of his colleagues. Girl friends or a possible wife search ended in no connection. His religious beliefs supported the male role of domination and authoritarianism.  He began to see the world in a dualistic manner –you were either a believer or condemned to Hell. Patients were complaining about his questionable therapeutic practices and strange conversations. His colleagues saw warning signs.  The precipitating factor for Maj. Nidal Malik action seems to be his frustration and anxiety about his pending deployment orders to go to Iraq. He wanted to be excused from serving in Iraq because of his Muslim beliefs. In addition. fellow doctors at Walter Reed, who had worked with him for four years have reported that from the beginning he had not made a very good first impression and the staff had many discussions about his performance and suitability to become a full fledge psychiatrist. The medical staff was very worried about this guy and yet no one step-up in caring way to stop him from being promoted and moved on to Fort Hood. He lacked interpersonal skills and was perceived uncooperative ( late for work many times) and unfriendly. He did not do a good job as a psychiatrist in training, was repeatedly warned, you better shape up, or, you know, you’re going to be in trouble. Trouble never came. He continued to be late for work, did badly in his classes, seemed inattentive to patients and outspoken and  belligerent about being Muslim, For example he once gave a lecture at Grand Rounds one day that really caused concern because on the rightness of suicide bombing and wrongness of the US occupation. This incident freaked a lot of doctors out. Where dozens of the medical staff come into an auditorium, and somebody stands at the podium at the front and gives a lecture about some medical or academic issue or clinical practice;  you know, what drugs to prescribe for what condition. But instead of that,  Hasan gave a long lecture on the Koran and talked about how if you don’t believe, you are condemned to hell. Your head is cut off. You’re set on fire. Burning oil is burned down your throat. This lecture was not about educating or informing his audience about the Koran or Muslim culture because he came across as a “true believer” in the support of terrorism. When questioned by an audience member about his position and views he stared the guy down. We now know the rest of the story about his promotion to Major and his being passed on to Fort Hood where his stress, alienation and angry intensified because of harassment and rejection of requests to be re-classified as a conscienious objector so Irag deployment would be haulted.  No one cared enough to confront these issues in an assertive and constructive way. He was left on his own to grow his “paranoid” theories of his fellow soldiers being his enemey and anger toward them and their way of life increased. And now many suffer and grief for the 13 soldiers gun down that horrific day at Fort Hood.

Eric Harris, one of the shooters at Columbine High School in Littleton, Colorado, in 1999 wrote in his suicide note to the community, “Your children who have ridiculed me, who have chosen not to accept me, who have treated me like I am not worth their time are dead.” A classmate of Dylan Klebold, the other shooter, said, “Dylan really felt unloved. He wasn’t so bad. He was lonely.” Incidentally, both Harris and Klebold were A students.

The Fort Hood and Columbine shootings are  an extreme case of alienation and  irrational thinking  erupting into violence against innocent others. We will never know how other aspects of these mass murder’s  relationships, families, and mental health and psychological makeup affected them or tipped the scales into anger, shooting and tragedy.

We will continue to debate how such tragedies can be averted and how much of a role organizational culture, interpersonal rejection and individual perceptions play in these tragedies. we know that an atmosphere that nurtures respectful relationships and confronts inappropriate behavior in caring, assertive and forth right ways can make a difference in stopping senseless, irrational, violent and  destructive acting out but it takes someone with courage to stand-up and confront them in a caring but forceful way. 

All across the world, people shoot “zingers, sarcasm, put-downs and disrespect one another daily. The consequences of these actions can go beyond a general feeling of unhappiness among the scorned and alienated targets, causing these outsiders to become paranoid, angry and engage in violence, or join extremists groups to feel a sense of belonging and acceptance.

Solution proposed

 One way to create a more constructive, inclusive way to encounter and connect with these loss souls is through caring and direct action. The action needs to start with ourselves– by holding ourselves responsible for confronting people who are acting inappropriately or in a threatening manner. I call this approach “constructive caring confrontation”. The core value in this open communication approach is accepting personal responsibility.  Imagine the positive change to our world if every military supervisor. boss. parent, educator, and political  leader focused on being “servant leaders” by helping his or her peers or team members to become the best individuals possible. Creating a critical mass of “caring others” who are passionate about mobilizing more love, caring and worth for others in pain or distress. This type of  responsibility could elevate the character of our workplaces, schools, military,and families —indeed all of mankind. For people to discharge that responsibility, they must learn and practice the art of caring confrontation. David Augsberger’s 2009 book, Caring Enough to Confront presents the following guidelines for effective caring confrontation:

• Confront with care. Confront only after actively listening and showing real care for the other person, and confront it only to express genuine understanding and concern not agreement.
• Confront gently. Speak tactfully, in a way you would like to be spoken to about a sensitive matter. For example, say, “I understand where you are coming from. I have been there, too. May I make a suggestion?” Do not offer more than the relationship can bear or draw out more than you have put into the relationship.
• Confront constructively. Make your positive intentions clear at the start to minimize the possibility that your comments may be interpreted as blaming, shaming, or punishing (negative aspects of most confrontation). For example, you might begin by saying, “John, you and I are good friends. What do you think about this idea for handling your stress and anger?”
• Confront with acceptance and trust. Assume that the other person’s intentions are good even if his or her actions are problematic. Acknowledge good intentions by saying, for example, “I know you want to be helpful, but …”
• Confront clearly. Report what you actually observe, what emotions you feel or sense that others feel, and what you conclude would be a good next step for the person you’re confronting. For example, “I heard what you said to Mary” (observation). “It seemed to hurt her feelings” (emotion). “I’m sure you didn’t mean to hurt her. Please apologize to her” (conclusion). What do you think and want to do?

” In caring I commit myself to the other; I hold myself out as someone who can be depended on. If there is an acute break in this relation because of my indifference, irresponsibility or neglect of my duties, I feel guilty, as if the other were to say,”Where were you when I needed you,why did you let me down?”  Milton Mayeroff, author of book entitled On Caring, 1971.

The disaster at Fort Hood again shows the inability for some people to see a problem, confront it and take responsibility for constructive action. Envision for a moment you and your colleagues sitting around the conference table at Walter Reed Army hospital discussing and reviewing an employee who has been demonstrating bizarre behavioral problems. Someone brings up the point that the Dr. X, who is in training to be psychiatrist, is unable to communicate and connect effectively with patients who are suffering from anxiety and PTSD. Another colleague brings up the fact that Dr. X is a practicing Muslim who has been sharing his anti-war and extreme Islamic views during a recent Grand Rounds presentation. Somebody else speculates on his mental stability and his ability to be in touch with reality (psychosis). It is a tragic observation and apparent that nobody in the room wants to deal with these inconvertible truths of instability, acting out and irrational thinking of Dr. X. The question becomes what are we going to do with him?  The answer promote him to Status of Major and transfer him to a place where he can be observe d and coached by a staff of experienced psychiatrists. In other words, don’t confront the problem but kick him down the road to Fort Hood. In retrospect, this was a terrible mistake  and a perfect example of irresponsible and uncaring behavior and irrational thinking by the people in charge at Walter Reed.

Of course the above story is not real and at this point only speculative but recently on NPR’s Morning edition DANIEL ZWERDLING, a well-respected journalist, has uncovered some disturbing information from doctors at Walter Reed Army hospital. On Morning Edition’s broadcast on, November 6, 2009 the alleged gunman Maj. Nidal Malik who shot and killed 13 people and wounded 30 others was reportedly upset by his pending deployment orders to go to Iraq. He wanted to be excused from serving in Iraq because of his Muslim beliefs. In addition. Zwerdling added that he spoke with someone who knew him, worked with him at Walter Reed. Here is the upsetting information Zwerdling reports, ” Earlier today, I spoke to a psychiatrist who worked very closely with Hasan and knows him very well. And he said, you know, from the beginning ( Hasan was there for four years) – the medical staff was very worried about this guy. He said the first thing is he’s cold, unfriendly. At least that’s who he came off as. He did not do a good job as a psychiatrist in training, was repeatedly warned, you better shape up, or, you know, you’re going to be in trouble. For example, he did badly in his classes, seemed disinterested. But second of all – and this is, perhaps, you know, more relevant. The psychiatrist says that he was very proud and upfront about being Muslim. And psychiatrist hastened to say, and nobody minded that. But he seemed almost belligerent about being Muslim, and he gave a lecture at grand rounds one day that really freaked a lot of doctors out.”  Zwerdling goes on, ” They have grand rounds, right? Where dozens of medical staff come into an auditorium, and somebody stands at the podium at the front and gives a lecture about some academic issue, you know, what drugs to prescribe for what condition. But instead of that, he – Hasan apparently gave a long lecture on the Koran and talked about how if you don’t believe, you are condemned to hell. Your head is cut off. You’re set on fire. Burning oil is burned down your throat. And I said to the psychiatrist, but this cold be a very interesting informational session, right? Where he’s educating everybody about the Koran. He said but what disturbed everybody was that Hasan seemed to believe these things. And actually, a Muslim in the audience, a psychiatrist, raised his hand and said, excuse me. But I’m a Muslim and I do not believe these things in the Koran, and then I don’t believe what you say the Koran says. And then Hasan didn’t say, well, I’m just giving you one point of view. He basically just stared the guy down.”

So the picture that is emerging is about a psychiatrist in training who was identified as eccentric and saying disturbing and inappropriate things to his colleagues and perhaps to the men he was for stress disorders. Zwerdling goes on to say that the psychiatrist he talked to said. “Maj. Nidal Malik was the kind of guy who the staff actually stood around in the hallway, saying: Do you think he’s a terrorist, could he sometime down the road be involved in fraternization or is he just weird? And now, apparently, Walter Reed is in a lockdown mode where they’ve been instructed – all the staff has been instructed: Do not talk to anybody about this investigation, except military people. Do not talk to the FBI, because they’re afraid, potentially, what if people decide to investigate the handling of this guy at Walter Reed and determine that people missed potential warning signs and did not confront these issues before promoting him and sending down the road to Fort Hood.”  As we all know this could mean bad things for  doctors in charge who didn’t take responsibility for stopping this guy when there were visible signs of his mental instability to serve in any capacity, let a lone as a psychiatrist.

What went wrong at Walter Reed?

1. Maybe too much politically correct thinking–we can’t step up and reprimand a Muslim because this would look like discrimination against a Muslim.

2. Group think– Because of difficult rules to remove someone from their position they decided to ignore all the warning signs and wash their hands of the problem by kicking it down the road.

3. Irrational thinking by people supervising Maj. Nidal Malik that a  problem like this is better ignored than confronted. It fits into Albert Ellis 12 irrational ideas that make people do stupid or not do the right things to resolve problems and be happy. “The idea that it is easier to avoid than to face life difficulties and self-responsibilities – instead of the idea that the so-called easy way is usually much harder in the long run.  And I would add that avoiding problems through inertia and inaction usually doesn’t make them go away but probably makes them worst in the long-run.

A person of wisdom knows that the task of becoming a leader is never finished. It’s an ongoing process of growth, development through experiences. It involves the courage to take risks, try new experiences and ponder insights gained through the unpredictability  and ambiguity of living. We live in times of change and uncertainty. Many seeking new answers to old problems, others trying to hold on to power, others just fed-up and may seek escape from stress and anxiousness in painful and unhealthy ways. The doom and gloom of the economic crisis, the deterioration of moral values and standards, the hurridiness and pervasiveness of the digital lifestyle, and the fragmentation of traditional societal institutions are not only inducing anxiety but also inspiring a search for simplicity and morally grounded in less material value systems. Consumption-driven wealth and status are being replaced by identity, belonging, and a strong desire to contribute  — or to experience — something “meaningful” rather than to acquire more stuff. Trust and reputation are no longer enablers for the exchange of goods, services, and information, they are replacements for them. Values are the new value. Meaning is exceeding customer expectations. The job of leadership today is not just to make money. It’s to make meaning and provide value through valuable experiences. The courage to live a new life experience and to capture it for others has been a strong and important journalistic technique for many years. For example, John Howard Griffin’s compelling book  Black Like Me . John Howard Griffin decided to cross the color line. Using medication that darkened his skin to deep brown, he exchanged his privileged life as a Southern white man for the disenfranchised world of an unemployed black man. His authentic, vivid and relevant accounts of his experiences as a black man provide an eyewitness to history about racism,  humanity, respect and dignity that we can all learn from even in the year of our first black president.  

See how a year long experience shook-up writer Becky Blanton self-identity and perception of homelessness. She shares her story during a presentation for TED, an organization that shares compelling and thought-provoking presentations by famous and not so famous people. Blanton began living in her van by choice. But one year after she began her adventure, she was broke, had fallen into the depths of depression, and felt like a loser because she was perceived as a “less than person” because of homelessness.

In the short video below, she talks about what she learned during just one year living in a van. She makes painfully important observations about homelessness, from the outside and the inside. Including the following five lessons:

1. The negative perceptions of others can easily impact our self-worth, if we allow it to.

2. Homelessness is about voiceless and denial it quickly becomes a lifestyle.

3. The speed of how fast you can decompensate is amazing — no sense of hope leads no purpose for living.

4. Stigma and discrimination are powerful influencers on our self-worth.

Although I wouldn’t classify Blanton as certified “homeless”, I still found her step-by-step plunge into depression and other mental and physical struggles powerful and deeply moving. Partially because she is authentic and open about real life experience inside a world most people would prefer to drive by and ignore. Maybe we all need to try this type of personal experience in order to gain more empathy for the less fortunate living amongst us.

 Blanton had her identity as a writer was ability to battle through adversity because of her resiliency and hope that opportunities awaited her at the end of her year on the streets. Many others are not as lucky. So the question is how we can provide support and services so that “hope” is never extinguished for the many voiceless and faceless citizens living on the streets? We can do better but what stops us from doing it?

“They say that time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself.” Andy Warhol

By using Constructive Optimism Living Process to face your problems and identify opportunities you can directly affect ways to act and create meaning in your life. By putting in place this powerful process you will put choice at the center of your life. You will become more responsible for creating your attitude  and behavioral response to life’s situations. It will no longer be acceptable to use the excuse that it is the stress around us or the situations we are in at home or work that “force” you to act or not act in certain ways. Each of us chooses our path. We behave in certain ways like ignoring, running away, blaming others, getting angry, if – only thinking , getting stuck, or just plain giving up because we don’t want to take responsibility. We do have the power act in more satisfying and meaningful ways to create a more integrative and balanced life. This Constructive Living Approach can help you feel more in control and better about yourself . In essence you begin to feel more loving and worthwhile which is one of the core ingredients of living a more fulfilling and meaningful life.

Principle #1–Choose a better attitude about others. We need to love and be loved. Start today to build stronger and happier relationships with others. Get involved in a positive way with others. 

Creating meaningful change exercise — Three good things in interacting with others.

Directions: I am asking you to commit to writing down three good things that went well in interacting with others each day and their causes every night for a week.

To make this experiment more helpful for all of us please share how this exercise on change made you feel about others and what do you think caused this new found feeling or insight.

Where has President Obama been on pushing for a robust Health Care Reform (HCR)? The wait and see what the Congress produces approach is now in the 11th hour and President Obama needs a “hail mary pass” to produce a bill that will pass. We now have “pro-life” and “anti-immigration” blue dog dems fighting amongst themselves.  This “laissez-faire” approach to leadership has left a void filled by “status quo” dems to “do nothing Republicans”. Let’s review view this failed strategy that now threatens Obama’s presidency. We stand on the brink of having a Bill Clinton or a true reformer like FDR. As a progressive, independent I would prefer FDR’s style or LBJ’s to this let’s see what happens hands off approach by Obama’s team. Where is the passion and committment displayed and talked about during the campaign?White House Strategy–Get a Bill passed and check it off the campaign promises list.

Tactics–Hand it over to Congress to hash out Reform; stay above the fray; provide a few general guidelines and framework; don’t get anybody upset; make the bill bi-partisan at any cost. Then wash your hands of it when implementation fails.  What a joke. And worse than it being a joke is that so many of us waited with baited breath for these “wise men” to Reform Health Care and save us from enslavement of the insurance companies. Why are we one of the last civilized nations to attack this moral problem? Human caring and common sense tell us that Health Care is a right not a privilege. Our wise men tell us we are moving too fast and that we can not afford Health Care for all. What a joke–we stand by as over 40,000 people die each year because they don’t have Health Care.  

Obama’s team has sacrificed principles and values for pragmatism of getting any old bill. In other words, the status quo remains in tack. Two specific examples of why this so-called Reform is a joke. What is this implementation date of 2013 all about? It is more foot-dragging and stalling as 144 people a month and 14,000 per year of our fellow citizens die without HCR.  Remember when Medicare passed it took one year from its passage in 1964 to get 10,000 million signed-up. This was in 1964, you can’t tell me that with new technology and the experience of running a system like Medicare that we can’t do better. The target for the so-called “Public Option” is 6,000 million by 2013. Don’t buy this joke of a Bill.

Apparently the best place to learn about a complicated political and health care issue is at the feet or purses of lobbyists in Washington DC’s (Lieberman, Backus, Conrad, Lincoln and other “blue dogs”) and in the restaurants with the ex-congressman and their wives (Bly, Daschel, Lieberman) with the wealthy of the K street crowd.

The bills being presented are a complete let-down and watered down corporate welfare program for insurance companies; I can’t say I expected them to pull a rabbit out of the hat in these next few days and weeks of negotiations. But if the basic plan for the White House is just get a bill and a few republicans to sing-on so you can call it bipartisan, then the White House strategy for HCR is working. We are not getting the “kind of change you can believe in”. We are getting some face-saving measures and crumbs from politicians who are bought and sold by big corporations; all of them are money hungry and put self-interest ahead of good public policy. These are opportunistic Senators and House of Representatives who don’t care. Instead of real change we are going to get mealy-mouthed nonsense and wishful thinking about change for the suffering American citizen. I am outraged. Where are the Progressives and sensible Independents who understand the economic and moral consequences of passing a “water-downed” bill? This bill is a handout for the private insurance companies; they now have the opportunity to raise insurance at double digit rates until 2013. The government is now going to be in the business of subdizing private insurance companies because we all will be required to pay higher taxes for medicare and new poverty level. This has turned into get a bill done no matter what the content. A weak and meager Public Option to help 6 million Amaricans and a manadate on all the rest of us to get insurance. What a joke–Obama and White House have sold out the progressives in favor of big business; by the way did I mention that we never even scored a single-payer option because the White House took it off the table!!!!   

” Whenever people exchange ideas with the intention of changing relationships, whenever they confer for agreement, they are negotiating.”  Gerald Nierenberg, author of Fundamentals of Negotiating 

What do you think of or visualize when you hear that organizations, two CEO’s or a husband and wife are negotiating such and such…? Most research says that most of us think of a formal process of trying to win an argument, win the contract, or play the game of “tough guys don’t back down” and use an aggressive approach to get our way. Most of us experience these interactions as hostile, conflict riddled, or end in I win-you lose game. 

Developing yourself as a leader-negotiator isn’t easy; behavioral change is difficult, time-consuming, and frustrating. However, removing the five most common barriers to learning, such as– what you need to know and what you need to do can make your path to self-improvement better:

1. Increase listening and understanding for creating a positive climate for negotiating. Overcome the Self-Fulfilling Prophecy (SFP)–If you don’t think you can get agreement, you can’t. Believe in your ability to listen and take responsibility and ownership for understanding the other person’s point of view.
2. Be patient. Positive, lasting agreements take time, usually 50% to 100% longer than most people initially think. Slow down time is on your side.
3. Accept mis-steps and false starts. Suspend first impressions.
4. Negotiations and influence takes real work. When setting out, be prepared to face challenges you didn’t anticipate.
5. Keep your eye on the prize and end goal. Refuse to negotiate with yourself and stay focused on minimum settlement points.  Something more important will inevitably come up. You need to make win-win negotiating a priority and refuse to let distractions divert your path.
6. Mobilization and Continuous Improvement. Once you’ve started to see positive changes in the negotiations and openness in discussions, don’t declare victory. Agreements that last can be fragile. Reward and support each step that brings you closer to agreement.

“Do the thing you fear and the death of fear is certain.”–Ralph Waldo Emerson

 ”Effective leadership begins with presence and self-awareness.  Knowing your impact on others, what motivates you (purpose), understanding and playing to your natural strengths and accepting weaknesses are critical keys for successfully communicating and connecting with others.   Brain researchers and psychologists tell us that self-awareness is not an inborn trait but a complex capacity people develop through life experiences.   It requires reflection, intuition and an ability to accept and process feedback from others.  It requires openness, an ability to deal with ambiguity and acceptance of  and caring for others.” MWH

Alignment Principle

It is natural to feel apprehension when speaking in front of a group, particularly a group of peers.  A certain level of anxiety is actually necessary for you to perform your best. The key is to use this anxiety to your advantage, harnessing it to make you dynamic and animated. The physical symptoms of anxiety are very similar to that of excitement. If you can train yourself to interpret your symptoms as excitement, instead of nerves, you are well on your way to using the anxiety to your advantage. So, how do you do this?

Controlling Anxiety
1. Avoid negative self-talk. For example, do not use phrases like, “They won’t listen. They’ll be hostile.” Talk like this is not only self-defeating, but it is self-fulfilling. Tell yourself instead that you will succeed. Tell yourself, “I’ve done my research. I’m prepared, and I have practiced.” These statements are also self-fulfilling–in a positive way.

2. Don’t exceed your time limits for a topic.  Know how much time you have been allotted and then keep to the schedule. Carefully preparing your material will allow you to cover the topic well, but also selectively. It takes longer to say something than it does to read something. The best way to make sure you do not run over time is to follow the suggestions in step 3.

3. Practice and prepare. Once your presentation material is prepared, it is time for you to prepare. Practice is the key to feeling confident. There are several ways to do this.

–Practice on an audio or video tape. Play it back to catch mistakes you might have made. This will help you catch distracting idiosyncrasies such as touching your hair, playing with your rings or saying “um” over and over again.

–Practice in front of a mirror. Remember to practice what you do with your hands and arms. If you use gestures when you speak, make sure they are natural and not overdone.

–After you have practiced on your own, it is good to get an “audience” to watch your presentation. An audience doesn’t have to be more than one person. Ask for constructive feedback that will help you improve and bolster your confidence.

–If you are trying to persuade your audience of your viewpoint, ask a friend to give you some opposing viewpoints to get a sense of what your audience may be thinking as they hear your presentation. Understanding opposing viewpoints is especially important if you allow questions after the presentation.

4. Know your audience. Your presentation must correlate to your audience’s interests or you will lose them. Knowing your audience will also give you a positive, confident attitude about speaking with them.

 5. Visualize yourself succeeding. Do not just tell yourself that you will do well; picture yourself doing well! Take a deep breath, close your eyes and imagine yourself walking to the front of the audience with your shoulders back and a smile on your face. See yourself speaking while the audience nods with approval, laughs at your jokes and applauds when you finish. Carry that successful mental image with you when it is time for you to present.

6. Fake it until you make it. Your audience will not know how nervous you are. They will only know what you show or tell them. Regardless of how you feel inside, act confident. Acting confident can actually make you feel confident. 

7. Don’t stress over what “could have been” or “should have been.” Leave the presentation behind once you have finished. Allow yourself five minutes to obsess about what you could have done differently, then move on. Plan constructively for your next project. Set some goals and take what you learned to make the next one even better. A good evaluation tool for yourself is to consider the impact your presentation had on the audience. After all, it was for them you did the presentation.

Dealing with Fears—Confront and grow

As I sat in the audience listening to the facilitator from the Center for Creative Leadership, Jeri Lou Johnson, little did I know that one sentence was about to change my point of view on life.

On this grey and dreary day Jeri Lou gave a marvelous presentation. She had many valuable things to say. But there was one line — one absolute gem — that stands out. Here’s what she said:

 “If you want to learn who you are, you must be willing to be uncomfortable.”

I’ll never forget those words. And Jerri was right on the money. To achieve your goals and realize your potential, you must be willing to be uncomfortable, take risks — to do things that you’re afraid to do. That’s how you develop your potential! 

Sounds so simple, doesn’t it? And yet, what do most people do when they face a frightening situation or new activity? They back away from the fear. They don’t take action. I know… because that’s what I did for many years of my life. And I can tell you without hesitation that it’s a losing strategy.Show me a successful person and I’ll show you someone who confronts his or her fears and takes action! 

Examining Our Fears

Have you ever been afraid or anxious before trying a new or challenging activity? Has that fear ever stopped you from taking action? I’m sure you’ve been paralyzed by fear at one time or another in your life. I know I have. That’s simply part of being human. Of course, every person has a different fear threshold. What frightens one person to death might have little impact on someone else. For example, to some, speaking in public or starting a new business is scary. Others might be fearful about asking someone for directions… or for a date. Regardless of how trivial or silly you believe your fears may be, this lesson applies to you.

When I talk about fear, I’m not referring to physical risks that might injure you or endanger your health, such as diving off cliffs in Acapulco or bungee jumping. I’m scared of those things, too — and I have no plans to do either of them. What I’m talking about here are those challenges that stand in the way of your personal and professional growth. These are the things that scare you — but which you know are necessary if you’re going to get what you want in life.

 The Comfort Zone

When you’re gripped by fear and anxiety, it’s usually because you’re stepping out of your comfort zone. Let’s take some time to discuss this important concept — and how it relates to your success and the development of your potential.

Each of us has a comfort zone, a zone of behavior that is familiar to us and where we feel comfortable and safe. Think of your comfort zone as the inside of a circle.

The activities and situations that lie inside the circle are non-threatening and familiar. They’re routine, part of your everyday life — the things you can do with no sweat. In this category are tasks such as speaking to your friends or co-workers or filling out the daily paperwork at your job.

When faced with something outside your comfort zone, you suddenly feel nervous. Your palms become sweaty and your heart pounds. You begin to wonder,

“Will I be able to handle it?
“Will others laugh at me?
“What will my friends and relatives say?”

As you look at the diagram above, what does the “X” represent for you? In other words, what fear is holding you back from reaching the next level of success or fulfillment in your life?

Is it fear of approaching new prospects?
Is it fear about changing careers?
Is it fear about learning new skills?
Is it fear of going back to school?
Is it fear of telling other people what’s on your mind?
Is it fear of public speaking?

Whatever that “X” represents for you, just be honest and admit it. My guess is that thousands, if not millions, of people have the very same fear you have! 

The Ultimate Solution: Just Do It

Ralph Waldo Emerson offered some simple advice, which, if followed, can transform your life. He said, “Do the thing you fear and the death of fear is certain.” I know this advice makes good sense, but some people are just too afraid to act. Remember my prior words about the steep price you pay when you let your fears dominate you.

In the end, running away from your fears is a losing strategy. It will only bring you frustration and unhappiness. I can tell you that from personal experience.

There’s nothing wrong with having some fears. Successful people have fears. The difference is that successful people take action and move forward despite being afraid. It’s not always easy, I’ll grant that. But you’ll always feel better about yourself when you face your fears.

In the last 30 years, I’ve had the privilege of traveling throughout the United States and Canada… and doing hundreds of workshops and presenting to thousands of people. During all this time, I haven’t met one person who confronted their fears… looked them in face…developed a plan of action…took action…received feedback on what worked and what didn’t…persevered with more action.. who ever regretted the journey of personal development and change. And I’ve met many people who tell me how much they regret not being able to tackle their fears — and suffered because of it. Have the courage to keep experimenting until you conquer those fears.

As a training/consultant friend, Bob Heckman, often says, “Don’t be one of those people who let negativity and regret take the place of dreams.”

 So, stretch yourself. Confront your fears and be willing to expand your comfort zone. The courage muscle can be developed just like any other muscle — with exercise. And when you do an activity outside your comfort zone a few times, you know what happens? That same activity becomes part of your comfort zone!

 There’s another bonus when you’re willing to expand your comfort zone. When you push through fear and take action in some areas of your life, you’ll develop confidence in other areas, as well. It’s true! As I became more comfortable as a speaker, I also became a better teacher, communicator, consultant and coach… the list goes on and on.

You can try to deceive yourself that it is no big deal.  But be assured you won’t develop your potential to the fullest unless you are willing to tackle your fears. Life doesn’t reward those who refuse to take risks and challenges. Confront your fears… and you’re on the way to developing your way to living a more meaningful and fulfilling life. Now list one of your fears__________________________________________________________ and begin to challenge it in the next 24 hours. Good Luck and stick with it till you conquer it.

” Most people would rush ahead and implement a solution before they know what the problem is and a plan for solving it.”  Mark W.Hardwick, Ph.D. Quality Selling through Quality Proposals, 1991, Minehan Quality Press. p 23.

Many business development and sales initiatives fail because the client’s needs and expectations were not met during the sales process. I call these events–sales pinches. Some of the pinches include: lack of information gathering and poor call preparation, poor analysis of the client’s problem, lack of information before writing a proposal, presenting solutions before listening and understanding, and presenting solutions from your point of view rather than the buyers.

Sales proposals can not be a cookie-cutter approach but needs to be experienced by the buyer as a sincere and customized approach to information gathering and problem solving. The solution we offer must be seen as a “valued proposition”. Here are a few of the missed steps and pinches that are inherent in a sales process: sales associates as pressing for a sale–often called the hard sell that is experience as insensitive to customer needs. Such an ego-centric process usually involves boiler-plate proposals and misaligned sales presentations. These efforts primarily focus on the sales professional’s and the selling organization’s goals of what the buyer needs, while the customer-centered process presents information, solutions and proposals that understand and are empathic to the buyer’s goals and expectations. When a sales step such as a presentation and proposal doesn’t close the “Needs and Expectations Gap” – the alignment between the buyer’s expectations and the seller’s sales approach – the potential client has little reason for listening and buying your pitch. We can’t be successful if this happens to often in our selling efforts.

 Writing a Customer-Centered Proposal Facilitates the Sales Process

A customer-centered sales process provides the sales professional an opportunity to help the buyer understand clearly the solution proposed and benefits of buying from you. The writing process itself adds clarity to the sale. It helps the sales professional through the sales process because it:

•  Prompts, and in some cases even forces, the sales professional to gather sufficient and accurate information about the buyer’s current situation and organization; through this process, the sales professional builds a rapport with the buyer and identifies and comprehends buyer expectations, needs, wants and problems
•  Requires and accurate description of the product or service being sold and defines its specific financial and non-financial benefits for the buyer; here the integrated presentation and proposal can eliminate reasons not to buy and meet  buyer  needs or offer solutions to difficult problems.
•  Includes a complete explanation of how the product or service will be installed, produced, implemented , delivered or introduced for the buyer; here the sales professional can use the presentation and proposal to answer the buyer’s questions and show value of the seller’s solutions.
•  Describes the business aspects of the deal, the buyers of the deal, the buyer’s expectations relative to such things as the seller’s staffing levels, roles, responsibilities, timeframes, fees/prices, and in-voicing schedules.
• A customer-centered communication process meets and often exceeds the buyer’s expectations.

Writing activities are integrated with selling activities. Activities in which the buyer partners with the sales professional by providing information, confirming needs and objectives, and evaluating proposed solutions and strategies.

How Important Are Proposals?

An increasing number of buyers are becoming more sophisticated and want to see specific, concrete proof points supporting the claims made by marketing literature and sales presentations.

For these buyers, there is simply too much at stake to take a risk on anything less than the best possible solution. In spite of these buyer attitude changes, many salespeople and organizations continue to discount the importance of integrating sales proposals and presentations. They view proposals as minor

Obstacle compared to building relationships and face to face communications. The truth is that an integrated communication strategy will include an excellent presentation and proposal. Creating this integration is not any easy process.  In reality, aligning sales activities is extremely difficult process which includes strategic thinking, asking good questions and understanding client’s goals.

A proposal is critical to the success of the sales professional and the organization. It represents the culmination of all selling activities—rapport-building, sales calls, demonstrations, negotiations, and presentations. A sales process generates revenues to cover the cost of sales, creates a profit, and continues the existence of the organization.

Furthermore, the content and quality of a sales proposal is equally important because it:

•  Stays in front of a buyer long after the sales professional is gone
•  Sells in the absence of the sales professional
•  Communicates all aspects of the sale
•  Gives the internal contact a document to sell within the client’s organization
•  Reaches the final decision-maker, even when the sales professional cannot

Every step of the sales process directly reflects the sales professional’s and the selling organization’s abilities and the concern for delivering excellence. In today’s competitive world, can anyone afford to jeopardize even one sale with poor communication processes; such as an excellent proposal and presentations.

Process with Structure: The Strategic and Winning Sales Proposal

Everybody, it seems, is selling a twelve-step program guaranteed to help us become successful in some aspect of our lives. The problem is that most of us rarely get past step number five. The good news for those of us in sales is we don’t have to go past that fifth step to craft a winning sales proposal. Many proposals drift from point to point, and yet might never hit upon the issues that drive a potential customer to a buying decision. With a well-organized and strategic proposal, broken down to five proven sections, you can go from offering cookie-cutter solutions to providing customer-driven solutions that significantly enhance your chances of closing big deals.

These five sections in a strategic sales proposal are interrelated and customer-focused. They categorize information and provide a logical sequence of information and ideas.

In summary, the structure for a strategic and winning proposal contains five main sections: 

1. Background Information

This section identifies the buyer’s current situation-related strategy and improvement opportunity—the buyer’s unresolved problem or wanted opportunity. This section must reflect your empathy for the buyer’s situation and pain. It must demonstrate a thorough understanding of the buyer’s business, particularly the function or functions associated with the improvement opportunity. More importantly, the section must document the findings of the buyer-seller improvement opportunity or pain removal analyses. It must include the buyer’s key performance indicators;  such as– current revenues, cost, and productivity levels as they relate to your proposed product or service solution.

2. Proposed Solution

This section presents the buyer-specific product or service application—how you can add value by helping the buyer achieve the improvement opportunity. This section must provide the buying decision makers with a clear understanding of your proposed solution and describe how it will help achieve the profit improvement opportunities identified in the Background Information section. It must also demonstrate your ability to define a realistic application for their proposed products or services to fit in the buyer’s business. Further, this section must present the decision makers with compelling reasons to make a change.

3. Implementation Management

Section Three discusses your company’s methods for implementing the proposed product or service. This section should describe your standard implementation methods or project management practices. It should define the steps, phases, and activities that your company normally follows when implementing the proposed product or delivering the proposed services. This section also should include estimated project or engagement resource requirements and timeframes. It provides an ideal opportunity for you to overlay the buyer’s unique implementation requirements with their standard business methods or quality assurance issues. The result is a custom project plan that indicates you have thought through the how, who, and when.

4. Why Us?–Seller Profile

This section discusses your company’s qualifications and business practices. Of the five proposal sections, this section contains the most standard wording. However, it does not mean the section represents boilerplate; rather, it means that its contents will require the fewest changes for use with different accounts. Much of the information contained in this section requires considerable thought and effort to develop. However, once developed, you will find that you can easily tailor this section to fit each unique sales situation.

5. Business Issues

This section groups all business-related items for ease of review and reference of  prices, expenses, and in-voicing schedule. One of this section’s primary goals is to avoid buyer surprises after the sale. Therefore, you should clearly document all the business issues regarding the proposed solution.

Finally, while it may take twelve steps to quit drinking or lose 150 pounds, you can significantly enhance your sales proposals in only five concrete and responsive sections. When you put those five sections together, you have the opportunity to open eyes and move your prospect into seeing the value your team brings to the problem or opportunity and move this sales campaign into the win column.

” Life is not constructed like a building–it is like an ocean. We don’t create it we immerse ourself in it to discover and experience it.” Dr.Mark

Every thought you have,

Every feeling you feel,

Every action you take is an experience—

Some experience are short-lived–powerful and long-lasting.

Others are long and never impactful,

Experiences are not good or bad–they just are.

Impact remains to be defined by us.

Others are part of everyday routines or special activities.

The key ones focus on survival, safety, suffering and fun.

Some are long and routine,

Some boring and depressing,

Some are painful and unforgiving.

And some are uplifting and fun.

Sometime experiences seem interconnected and other times random.

Maybe that is what meaning in life is –just a bundle of moment to moment experiences.

Filtered by thought, reflection, emotions and impulsivity.

Meaning provided by our own idiosyncratic perceptions–accept them and life is renewed every second.

Challenge and fight them –you join “the figure it” out crowd.

Search, searching and searching for unreachable answers–

You cross the threshold when acceptance and ambiguity drives your search.

Life can not be choreographed as a dance… and yet embracing faith, luck or chance may ease the pain and be your guide for living a changeable and fresh experience…

” It is to late in the day for the House of Reps to buckle-in on the Public Option or the Senate to kick the can down the road for the States to decide on Health Care Reform.  The “Blue Dog” Democrats and the party of “NO” Republicans are winning by stalling and not caring. I don’t understand their lack of moral conscientious. How can you not care about 144 people/day dying or 44,000/year dying who don’t have health care insurance. Watering down the Public Option is putting the Health Care Reform at risk because if it doesn’t work the President will be scapegoat as the one who failed. These devious plans to defeat Health Care Reform need to be challenged by the Obama team. The Obama team seem to want any bill so they can say they did something. What do I want to see?  Call their bluff progressives and vote this bill down and go back and fight the real battle for a “Single-Payer or Medicare for All Plan.”  MWH  

Take the gloves off–the Blue Dogs and Republicans don’t care about Health Care Reform. They want Obama to fail in this important Health Care initiative. They want to hand over more customers to the insurance companies. This in my opinion is corporate welfare at its worst. I am willing to trade the government for the insurance guys and replace over paid executives and excessive profiteering with competitive and competent bureaucrats and no profits. I am sure that this is an inalienable right for everyone living in America. The Republicans and Conservative Democrats worship the almighty dollar and their self interests not their constituents  The only option they support will be one that keeps money in their pockets. For example,  the Republicans who are against reform have approximately 100,000 citizens without Health Insurance and let 100 of these people die every year. If these citizens were dying at the hands of terrorist they would spending what every money it took to solve the problem and protect their people.   Instead of stepping out and doing what is right they use fear ( death-bed and government take over arguments), lie for example Senator Grassly(R) and Backus (D) and Conrad(D) all saying we don’t have the votes for a public option. Blue Dog Democrats and Republicans will say or do anything to block Health Care reform because they have been bought by the Insurance and Pharma lobbyists. 

President  Obama needs to be an assertive and forthright leader and get his team aligned on one message–”We can’t wait to do the morally right thing. Health Care now for the people not for profits”.  His willingness to reach out and include Republicans in the development of the Recovery Package shows that he values many points of view. His attempt to hand Health Care over to Congress to solve has proven that co-creation is difficult and self-interest prevails over principles. The President  is playing it save while everyday people are dying. He is still thinking and acting like a Senator. And what we need is a forceful leader. Obviously. there are no easy solutions for the broken Health Care system in America. Remember we voted for change we can believe in last November. Now a lot of us are beginning to fear that we elected only an opportunistic and pragmatic President who just wants to put a check next to Health Care bill passed rather than true Health Care Reform. The President says, we have come along way toward reform and neglects to say how much we have lost through this process. He needs to now act on his campaign promises for true Health Care Reform. Building trust starts with good campaign slogans and intentions. Yet true leadership is not about words or charisma, but about results. The majority of American’s want true and robust Health Care Reform.  I think the time has come to lay out clearly what he wants and challenge the Republicans and “Blue Dogs” to filibuster the bill he wants.  This action would be leadership we can believe in. He needs to be more passionate about why we don’t want and can’t afford a Health Care bill without a strong public option. He must show people his willingness to fight for what is right. His passion would bring new support from all those who voted for him or now need to see him act as a President. It motivates and mobilizes people to help with the passage of real Health Care Reform. Time is running out Mr. President and if we don’t win on this battle you may be only a one-term President. Talk about risk and disappointment. Please step up–your time to be a leader of the people is NOW!!  

http://www.ted.com/talks/view/id/618

If you have not discovered the TED talks you are missing one of the best forums for ideas in business and life now available. I am including this video from Daniel Pink’s speech at TED  because in thirty years of consulting, it is the best  explanation of what works in motivating others. I am always asked by seminar participants–How do you motivate others? My answer has always been less than adequate. You can’t motivate individuals for the long-term. As a manager you can only create the right positive conditions and climate so people can use their strengths to do their best work. Enjoy the clip and share what are the best motivators you have found that work. Motivation and excellence is in our hands as leader-managers so chose the right methods or lose great talent.

..

“no matter how difficult the path may be, choosing to give up, before one has had the chance to fly, only holds the human spirit back…Life ultimately means taking the responsibility to find the right answer to its problems and to fulfill the tasks which it constantly sets for each individual.”  Victor Frankl

Critical Questions for Living a Life of Constructive Optimism and Meaning.

1.   Exercise your freedom to choose your attitude

2.   Don’t work against yourself–choose positive experiences and control impulses

3.   Look at yourself from a distance–don’t take yourself so seriously; develop a good sense of humor

4.   Shift your focus of attention away from self to someone or something else (de-reflecting or detaching)

5.   Extend beyond Yourself–Servant Leader “Be a Man for Others” 

6.   Realize your need and will to have meaning in life–create a purpose to make a difference 

7.   Detect the meaning of life’s moments–Live in the “Here and Now.”