Where has President Obama been on pushing for a robust Health Care Reform (HCR)? The wait and see what the Congress produces approach is now in the 11th hour and President Obama needs a “hail mary pass” to produce a bill that will pass. We now have “pro-life” and “anti-immigration” blue dog dems fighting amongst themselves.  This “laissez-faire” approach to leadership has left a void filled by “status quo” dems to “do nothing Republicans”. Let’s review view this failed strategy that now threatens Obama’s presidency. We stand on the brink of having a Bill Clinton or a true reformer like FDR. As a progressive, independent I would prefer FDR’s style or LBJ’s to this let’s see what happens hands off approach by Obama’s team. Where is the passion and committment displayed and talked about during the campaign?White House Strategy–Get a Bill passed and check it off the campaign promises list.

Tactics–Hand it over to Congress to hash out Reform; stay above the fray; provide a few general guidelines and framework; don’t get anybody upset; make the bill bi-partisan at any cost. Then wash your hands of it when implementation fails.  What a joke. And worse than it being a joke is that so many of us waited with baited breath for these “wise men” to Reform Health Care and save us from enslavement of the insurance companies. Why are we one of the last civilized nations to attack this moral problem? Human caring and common sense tell us that Health Care is a right not a privilege. Our wise men tell us we are moving too fast and that we can not afford Health Care for all. What a joke–we stand by as over 40,000 people die each year because they don’t have Health Care.  

Obama’s team has sacrificed principles and values for pragmatism of getting any old bill. In other words, the status quo remains in tack. Two specific examples of why this so-called Reform is a joke. What is this implementation date of 2013 all about? It is more foot-dragging and stalling as 144 people a month and 14,000 per year of our fellow citizens die without HCR.  Remember when Medicare passed it took one year from its passage in 1964 to get 10,000 million signed-up. This was in 1964, you can’t tell me that with new technology and the experience of running a system like Medicare that we can’t do better. The target for the so-called “Public Option” is 6,000 million by 2013. Don’t buy this joke of a Bill.

Apparently the best place to learn about a complicated political and health care issue is at the feet or purses of lobbyists in Washington DC’s (Lieberman, Backus, Conrad, Lincoln and other “blue dogs”) and in the restaurants with the ex-congressman and their wives (Bly, Daschel, Lieberman) with the wealthy of the K street crowd.

The bills being presented are a complete let-down and watered down corporate welfare program for insurance companies; I can’t say I expected them to pull a rabbit out of the hat in these next few days and weeks of negotiations. But if the basic plan for the White House is just get a bill and a few republicans to sing-on so you can call it bipartisan, then the White House strategy for HCR is working. We are not getting the “kind of change you can believe in”. We are getting some face-saving measures and crumbs from politicians who are bought and sold by big corporations; all of them are money hungry and put self-interest ahead of good public policy. These are opportunistic Senators and House of Representatives who don’t care. Instead of real change we are going to get mealy-mouthed nonsense and wishful thinking about change for the suffering American citizen. I am outraged. Where are the Progressives and sensible Independents who understand the economic and moral consequences of passing a “water-downed” bill? This bill is a handout for the private insurance companies; they now have the opportunity to raise insurance at double digit rates until 2013. The government is now going to be in the business of subdizing private insurance companies because we all will be required to pay higher taxes for medicare and new poverty level. This has turned into get a bill done no matter what the content. A weak and meager Public Option to help 6 million Amaricans and a manadate on all the rest of us to get insurance. What a joke–Obama and White House have sold out the progressives in favor of big business; by the way did I mention that we never even scored a single-payer option because the White House took it off the table!!!!   

” Whenever people exchange ideas with the intention of changing relationships, whenever they confer for agreement, they are negotiating.”  Gerald Nierenberg, author of Fundamentals of Negotiating 

What do you think of or visualize when you hear that organizations, two CEO’s or a husband and wife are negotiating such and such…? Most research says that most of us think of a formal process of trying to win an argument, win the contract, or play the game of “tough guys don’t back down” and use an aggressive approach to get our way. Most of us experience these interactions as hostile, conflict riddled, or end in I win-you lose game. 

Developing yourself as a leader-negotiator isn’t easy; behavioral change is difficult, time-consuming, and frustrating. However, removing the five most common barriers to learning, such as– what you need to know and what you need to do can make your path to self-improvement better:

1. Increase listening and understanding for creating a positive climate for negotiating. Overcome the Self-Fulfilling Prophecy (SFP)–If you don’t think you can get agreement, you can’t. Believe in your ability to listen and take responsibility and ownership for understanding the other person’s point of view.
2. Be patient. Positive, lasting agreements take time, usually 50% to 100% longer than most people initially think. Slow down time is on your side.
3. Accept mis-steps and false starts. Suspend first impressions.
4. Negotiations and influence takes real work. When setting out, be prepared to face challenges you didn’t anticipate.
5. Keep your eye on the prize and end goal. Refuse to negotiate with yourself and stay focused on minimum settlement points.  Something more important will inevitably come up. You need to make win-win negotiating a priority and refuse to let distractions divert your path.
6. Mobilization and Continuous Improvement. Once you’ve started to see positive changes in the negotiations and openness in discussions, don’t declare victory. Agreements that last can be fragile. Reward and support each step that brings you closer to agreement.

“Do the thing you fear and the death of fear is certain.”–Ralph Waldo Emerson

 ”Effective leadership begins with presence and self-awareness.  Knowing your impact on others, what motivates you (purpose), understanding and playing to your natural strengths and accepting weaknesses are critical keys for successfully communicating and connecting with others.   Brain researchers and psychologists tell us that self-awareness is not an inborn trait but a complex capacity people develop through life experiences.   It requires reflection, intuition and an ability to accept and process feedback from others.  It requires openness, an ability to deal with ambiguity and acceptance of  and caring for others.” MWH

Alignment Principle

It is natural to feel apprehension when speaking in front of a group, particularly a group of peers.  A certain level of anxiety is actually necessary for you to perform your best. The key is to use this anxiety to your advantage, harnessing it to make you dynamic and animated. The physical symptoms of anxiety are very similar to that of excitement. If you can train yourself to interpret your symptoms as excitement, instead of nerves, you are well on your way to using the anxiety to your advantage. So, how do you do this?

Controlling Anxiety
1. Avoid negative self-talk. For example, do not use phrases like, “They won’t listen. They’ll be hostile.” Talk like this is not only self-defeating, but it is self-fulfilling. Tell yourself instead that you will succeed. Tell yourself, “I’ve done my research. I’m prepared, and I have practiced.” These statements are also self-fulfilling–in a positive way.

2. Don’t exceed your time limits for a topic.  Know how much time you have been allotted and then keep to the schedule. Carefully preparing your material will allow you to cover the topic well, but also selectively. It takes longer to say something than it does to read something. The best way to make sure you do not run over time is to follow the suggestions in step 3.

3. Practice and prepare. Once your presentation material is prepared, it is time for you to prepare. Practice is the key to feeling confident. There are several ways to do this.

–Practice on an audio or video tape. Play it back to catch mistakes you might have made. This will help you catch distracting idiosyncrasies such as touching your hair, playing with your rings or saying “um” over and over again.

–Practice in front of a mirror. Remember to practice what you do with your hands and arms. If you use gestures when you speak, make sure they are natural and not overdone.

–After you have practiced on your own, it is good to get an “audience” to watch your presentation. An audience doesn’t have to be more than one person. Ask for constructive feedback that will help you improve and bolster your confidence.

–If you are trying to persuade your audience of your viewpoint, ask a friend to give you some opposing viewpoints to get a sense of what your audience may be thinking as they hear your presentation. Understanding opposing viewpoints is especially important if you allow questions after the presentation.

4. Know your audience. Your presentation must correlate to your audience’s interests or you will lose them. Knowing your audience will also give you a positive, confident attitude about speaking with them.

 5. Visualize yourself succeeding. Do not just tell yourself that you will do well; picture yourself doing well! Take a deep breath, close your eyes and imagine yourself walking to the front of the audience with your shoulders back and a smile on your face. See yourself speaking while the audience nods with approval, laughs at your jokes and applauds when you finish. Carry that successful mental image with you when it is time for you to present.

6. Fake it until you make it. Your audience will not know how nervous you are. They will only know what you show or tell them. Regardless of how you feel inside, act confident. Acting confident can actually make you feel confident. 

7. Don’t stress over what “could have been” or “should have been.” Leave the presentation behind once you have finished. Allow yourself five minutes to obsess about what you could have done differently, then move on. Plan constructively for your next project. Set some goals and take what you learned to make the next one even better. A good evaluation tool for yourself is to consider the impact your presentation had on the audience. After all, it was for them you did the presentation.

Dealing with Fears—Confront and grow

As I sat in the audience listening to the facilitator from the Center for Creative Leadership, Jeri Lou Johnson, little did I know that one sentence was about to change my point of view on life.

On this grey and dreary day Jeri Lou gave a marvelous presentation. She had many valuable things to say. But there was one line — one absolute gem — that stands out. Here’s what she said:

 “If you want to learn who you are, you must be willing to be uncomfortable.”

I’ll never forget those words. And Jerri was right on the money. To achieve your goals and realize your potential, you must be willing to be uncomfortable, take risks — to do things that you’re afraid to do. That’s how you develop your potential! 

Sounds so simple, doesn’t it? And yet, what do most people do when they face a frightening situation or new activity? They back away from the fear. They don’t take action. I know… because that’s what I did for many years of my life. And I can tell you without hesitation that it’s a losing strategy.Show me a successful person and I’ll show you someone who confronts his or her fears and takes action! 

Examining Our Fears

Have you ever been afraid or anxious before trying a new or challenging activity? Has that fear ever stopped you from taking action? I’m sure you’ve been paralyzed by fear at one time or another in your life. I know I have. That’s simply part of being human. Of course, every person has a different fear threshold. What frightens one person to death might have little impact on someone else. For example, to some, speaking in public or starting a new business is scary. Others might be fearful about asking someone for directions… or for a date. Regardless of how trivial or silly you believe your fears may be, this lesson applies to you.

When I talk about fear, I’m not referring to physical risks that might injure you or endanger your health, such as diving off cliffs in Acapulco or bungee jumping. I’m scared of those things, too — and I have no plans to do either of them. What I’m talking about here are those challenges that stand in the way of your personal and professional growth. These are the things that scare you — but which you know are necessary if you’re going to get what you want in life.

 The Comfort Zone

When you’re gripped by fear and anxiety, it’s usually because you’re stepping out of your comfort zone. Let’s take some time to discuss this important concept — and how it relates to your success and the development of your potential.

Each of us has a comfort zone, a zone of behavior that is familiar to us and where we feel comfortable and safe. Think of your comfort zone as the inside of a circle.

The activities and situations that lie inside the circle are non-threatening and familiar. They’re routine, part of your everyday life — the things you can do with no sweat. In this category are tasks such as speaking to your friends or co-workers or filling out the daily paperwork at your job.

When faced with something outside your comfort zone, you suddenly feel nervous. Your palms become sweaty and your heart pounds. You begin to wonder,

“Will I be able to handle it?
“Will others laugh at me?
“What will my friends and relatives say?”

As you look at the diagram above, what does the “X” represent for you? In other words, what fear is holding you back from reaching the next level of success or fulfillment in your life?

Is it fear of approaching new prospects?
Is it fear about changing careers?
Is it fear about learning new skills?
Is it fear of going back to school?
Is it fear of telling other people what’s on your mind?
Is it fear of public speaking?

Whatever that “X” represents for you, just be honest and admit it. My guess is that thousands, if not millions, of people have the very same fear you have! 

The Ultimate Solution: Just Do It

Ralph Waldo Emerson offered some simple advice, which, if followed, can transform your life. He said, “Do the thing you fear and the death of fear is certain.” I know this advice makes good sense, but some people are just too afraid to act. Remember my prior words about the steep price you pay when you let your fears dominate you.

In the end, running away from your fears is a losing strategy. It will only bring you frustration and unhappiness. I can tell you that from personal experience.

There’s nothing wrong with having some fears. Successful people have fears. The difference is that successful people take action and move forward despite being afraid. It’s not always easy, I’ll grant that. But you’ll always feel better about yourself when you face your fears.

In the last 30 years, I’ve had the privilege of traveling throughout the United States and Canada… and doing hundreds of workshops and presenting to thousands of people. During all this time, I haven’t met one person who confronted their fears… looked them in face…developed a plan of action…took action…received feedback on what worked and what didn’t…persevered with more action.. who ever regretted the journey of personal development and change. And I’ve met many people who tell me how much they regret not being able to tackle their fears — and suffered because of it. Have the courage to keep experimenting until you conquer those fears.

As a training/consultant friend, Bob Heckman, often says, “Don’t be one of those people who let negativity and regret take the place of dreams.”

 So, stretch yourself. Confront your fears and be willing to expand your comfort zone. The courage muscle can be developed just like any other muscle — with exercise. And when you do an activity outside your comfort zone a few times, you know what happens? That same activity becomes part of your comfort zone!

 There’s another bonus when you’re willing to expand your comfort zone. When you push through fear and take action in some areas of your life, you’ll develop confidence in other areas, as well. It’s true! As I became more comfortable as a speaker, I also became a better teacher, communicator, consultant and coach… the list goes on and on.

You can try to deceive yourself that it is no big deal.  But be assured you won’t develop your potential to the fullest unless you are willing to tackle your fears. Life doesn’t reward those who refuse to take risks and challenges. Confront your fears… and you’re on the way to developing your way to living a more meaningful and fulfilling life. Now list one of your fears__________________________________________________________ and begin to challenge it in the next 24 hours. Good Luck and stick with it till you conquer it.

” Most people would rush ahead and implement a solution before they know what the problem is and a plan for solving it.”  Mark W.Hardwick, Ph.D. Quality Selling through Quality Proposals, 1991, Minehan Quality Press. p 23.

Many business development and sales initiatives fail because the client’s needs and expectations were not met during the sales process. I call these events–sales pinches. Some of the pinches include: lack of information gathering and poor call preparation, poor analysis of the client’s problem, lack of information before writing a proposal, presenting solutions before listening and understanding, and presenting solutions from your point of view rather than the buyers.

Sales proposals can not be a cookie-cutter approach but needs to be experienced by the buyer as a sincere and customized approach to information gathering and problem solving. The solution we offer must be seen as a “valued proposition”. Here are a few of the missed steps and pinches that are inherent in a sales process: sales associates as pressing for a sale–often called the hard sell that is experience as insensitive to customer needs. Such an ego-centric process usually involves boiler-plate proposals and misaligned sales presentations. These efforts primarily focus on the sales professional’s and the selling organization’s goals of what the buyer needs, while the customer-centered process presents information, solutions and proposals that understand and are empathic to the buyer’s goals and expectations. When a sales step such as a presentation and proposal doesn’t close the “Needs and Expectations Gap” – the alignment between the buyer’s expectations and the seller’s sales approach – the potential client has little reason for listening and buying your pitch. We can’t be successful if this happens to often in our selling efforts.

 Writing a Customer-Centered Proposal Facilitates the Sales Process

A customer-centered sales process provides the sales professional an opportunity to help the buyer understand clearly the solution proposed and benefits of buying from you. The writing process itself adds clarity to the sale. It helps the sales professional through the sales process because it:

•  Prompts, and in some cases even forces, the sales professional to gather sufficient and accurate information about the buyer’s current situation and organization; through this process, the sales professional builds a rapport with the buyer and identifies and comprehends buyer expectations, needs, wants and problems
•  Requires and accurate description of the product or service being sold and defines its specific financial and non-financial benefits for the buyer; here the integrated presentation and proposal can eliminate reasons not to buy and meet  buyer  needs or offer solutions to difficult problems.
•  Includes a complete explanation of how the product or service will be installed, produced, implemented , delivered or introduced for the buyer; here the sales professional can use the presentation and proposal to answer the buyer’s questions and show value of the seller’s solutions.
•  Describes the business aspects of the deal, the buyers of the deal, the buyer’s expectations relative to such things as the seller’s staffing levels, roles, responsibilities, timeframes, fees/prices, and in-voicing schedules.
• A customer-centered communication process meets and often exceeds the buyer’s expectations.

Writing activities are integrated with selling activities. Activities in which the buyer partners with the sales professional by providing information, confirming needs and objectives, and evaluating proposed solutions and strategies.

How Important Are Proposals?

An increasing number of buyers are becoming more sophisticated and want to see specific, concrete proof points supporting the claims made by marketing literature and sales presentations.

For these buyers, there is simply too much at stake to take a risk on anything less than the best possible solution. In spite of these buyer attitude changes, many salespeople and organizations continue to discount the importance of integrating sales proposals and presentations. They view proposals as minor

Obstacle compared to building relationships and face to face communications. The truth is that an integrated communication strategy will include an excellent presentation and proposal. Creating this integration is not any easy process.  In reality, aligning sales activities is extremely difficult process which includes strategic thinking, asking good questions and understanding client’s goals.

A proposal is critical to the success of the sales professional and the organization. It represents the culmination of all selling activities—rapport-building, sales calls, demonstrations, negotiations, and presentations. A sales process generates revenues to cover the cost of sales, creates a profit, and continues the existence of the organization.

Furthermore, the content and quality of a sales proposal is equally important because it:

•  Stays in front of a buyer long after the sales professional is gone
•  Sells in the absence of the sales professional
•  Communicates all aspects of the sale
•  Gives the internal contact a document to sell within the client’s organization
•  Reaches the final decision-maker, even when the sales professional cannot

Every step of the sales process directly reflects the sales professional’s and the selling organization’s abilities and the concern for delivering excellence. In today’s competitive world, can anyone afford to jeopardize even one sale with poor communication processes; such as an excellent proposal and presentations.

Process with Structure: The Strategic and Winning Sales Proposal

Everybody, it seems, is selling a twelve-step program guaranteed to help us become successful in some aspect of our lives. The problem is that most of us rarely get past step number five. The good news for those of us in sales is we don’t have to go past that fifth step to craft a winning sales proposal. Many proposals drift from point to point, and yet might never hit upon the issues that drive a potential customer to a buying decision. With a well-organized and strategic proposal, broken down to five proven sections, you can go from offering cookie-cutter solutions to providing customer-driven solutions that significantly enhance your chances of closing big deals.

These five sections in a strategic sales proposal are interrelated and customer-focused. They categorize information and provide a logical sequence of information and ideas.

In summary, the structure for a strategic and winning proposal contains five main sections: 

1. Background Information

This section identifies the buyer’s current situation-related strategy and improvement opportunity—the buyer’s unresolved problem or wanted opportunity. This section must reflect your empathy for the buyer’s situation and pain. It must demonstrate a thorough understanding of the buyer’s business, particularly the function or functions associated with the improvement opportunity. More importantly, the section must document the findings of the buyer-seller improvement opportunity or pain removal analyses. It must include the buyer’s key performance indicators;  such as– current revenues, cost, and productivity levels as they relate to your proposed product or service solution.

2. Proposed Solution

This section presents the buyer-specific product or service application—how you can add value by helping the buyer achieve the improvement opportunity. This section must provide the buying decision makers with a clear understanding of your proposed solution and describe how it will help achieve the profit improvement opportunities identified in the Background Information section. It must also demonstrate your ability to define a realistic application for their proposed products or services to fit in the buyer’s business. Further, this section must present the decision makers with compelling reasons to make a change.

3. Implementation Management

Section Three discusses your company’s methods for implementing the proposed product or service. This section should describe your standard implementation methods or project management practices. It should define the steps, phases, and activities that your company normally follows when implementing the proposed product or delivering the proposed services. This section also should include estimated project or engagement resource requirements and timeframes. It provides an ideal opportunity for you to overlay the buyer’s unique implementation requirements with their standard business methods or quality assurance issues. The result is a custom project plan that indicates you have thought through the how, who, and when.

4. Why Us?–Seller Profile

This section discusses your company’s qualifications and business practices. Of the five proposal sections, this section contains the most standard wording. However, it does not mean the section represents boilerplate; rather, it means that its contents will require the fewest changes for use with different accounts. Much of the information contained in this section requires considerable thought and effort to develop. However, once developed, you will find that you can easily tailor this section to fit each unique sales situation.

5. Business Issues

This section groups all business-related items for ease of review and reference of  prices, expenses, and in-voicing schedule. One of this section’s primary goals is to avoid buyer surprises after the sale. Therefore, you should clearly document all the business issues regarding the proposed solution.

Finally, while it may take twelve steps to quit drinking or lose 150 pounds, you can significantly enhance your sales proposals in only five concrete and responsive sections. When you put those five sections together, you have the opportunity to open eyes and move your prospect into seeing the value your team brings to the problem or opportunity and move this sales campaign into the win column.

” Life is not constructed like a building–it is like an ocean. We don’t create it we immerse ourself in it to discover and experience it.” Dr.Mark

Every thought you have,

Every feeling you feel,

Every action you take is an experience—

Some experience are short-lived–powerful and long-lasting.

Others are long and never impactful,

Experiences are not good or bad–they just are.

Impact remains to be defined by us.

Others are part of everyday routines or special activities.

The key ones focus on survival, safety, suffering and fun.

Some are long and routine,

Some boring and depressing,

Some are painful and unforgiving.

And some are uplifting and fun.

Sometime experiences seem interconnected and other times random.

Maybe that is what meaning in life is –just a bundle of moment to moment experiences.

Filtered by thought, reflection, emotions and impulsivity.

Meaning provided by our own idiosyncratic perceptions–accept them and life is renewed every second.

Challenge and fight them –you join “the figure it” out crowd.

Search, searching and searching for unreachable answers–

You cross the threshold when acceptance and ambiguity drives your search.

Life can not be choreographed as a dance… and yet embracing faith, luck or chance may ease the pain and be your guide for living a changeable and fresh experience…

” It is to late in the day for the House of Reps to buckle-in on the Public Option or the Senate to kick the can down the road for the States to decide on Health Care Reform.  The “Blue Dog” Democrats and the party of “NO” Republicans are winning by stalling and not caring. I don’t understand their lack of moral conscientious. How can you not care about 144 people/day dying or 44,000/year dying who don’t have health care insurance. Watering down the Public Option is putting the Health Care Reform at risk because if it doesn’t work the President will be scapegoat as the one who failed. These devious plans to defeat Health Care Reform need to be challenged by the Obama team. The Obama team seem to want any bill so they can say they did something. What do I want to see?  Call their bluff progressives and vote this bill down and go back and fight the real battle for a “Single-Payer or Medicare for All Plan.”  MWH  

Take the gloves off–the Blue Dogs and Republicans don’t care about Health Care Reform. They want Obama to fail in this important Health Care initiative. They want to hand over more customers to the insurance companies. This in my opinion is corporate welfare at its worst. I am willing to trade the government for the insurance guys and replace over paid executives and excessive profiteering with competitive and competent bureaucrats and no profits. I am sure that this is an inalienable right for everyone living in America. The Republicans and Conservative Democrats worship the almighty dollar and their self interests not their constituents  The only option they support will be one that keeps money in their pockets. For example,  the Republicans who are against reform have approximately 100,000 citizens without Health Insurance and let 100 of these people die every year. If these citizens were dying at the hands of terrorist they would spending what every money it took to solve the problem and protect their people.   Instead of stepping out and doing what is right they use fear ( death-bed and government take over arguments), lie for example Senator Grassly(R) and Backus (D) and Conrad(D) all saying we don’t have the votes for a public option. Blue Dog Democrats and Republicans will say or do anything to block Health Care reform because they have been bought by the Insurance and Pharma lobbyists. 

President  Obama needs to be an assertive and forthright leader and get his team aligned on one message–”We can’t wait to do the morally right thing. Health Care now for the people not for profits”.  His willingness to reach out and include Republicans in the development of the Recovery Package shows that he values many points of view. His attempt to hand Health Care over to Congress to solve has proven that co-creation is difficult and self-interest prevails over principles. The President  is playing it save while everyday people are dying. He is still thinking and acting like a Senator. And what we need is a forceful leader. Obviously. there are no easy solutions for the broken Health Care system in America. Remember we voted for change we can believe in last November. Now a lot of us are beginning to fear that we elected only an opportunistic and pragmatic President who just wants to put a check next to Health Care bill passed rather than true Health Care Reform. The President says, we have come along way toward reform and neglects to say how much we have lost through this process. He needs to now act on his campaign promises for true Health Care Reform. Building trust starts with good campaign slogans and intentions. Yet true leadership is not about words or charisma, but about results. The majority of American’s want true and robust Health Care Reform.  I think the time has come to lay out clearly what he wants and challenge the Republicans and “Blue Dogs” to filibuster the bill he wants.  This action would be leadership we can believe in. He needs to be more passionate about why we don’t want and can’t afford a Health Care bill without a strong public option. He must show people his willingness to fight for what is right. His passion would bring new support from all those who voted for him or now need to see him act as a President. It motivates and mobilizes people to help with the passage of real Health Care Reform. Time is running out Mr. President and if we don’t win on this battle you may be only a one-term President. Talk about risk and disappointment. Please step up–your time to be a leader of the people is NOW!!  

http://www.ted.com/talks/view/id/618

If you have not discovered the TED talks you are missing one of the best forums for ideas in business and life now available. I am including this video from Daniel Pink’s speech at TED  because in thirty years of consulting, it is the best  explanation of what works in motivating others. I am always asked by seminar participants–How do you motivate others? My answer has always been less than adequate. You can’t motivate individuals for the long-term. As a manager you can only create the right positive conditions and climate so people can use their strengths to do their best work. Enjoy the clip and share what are the best motivators you have found that work. Motivation and excellence is in our hands as leader-managers so chose the right methods or lose great talent.

..

“no matter how difficult the path may be, choosing to give up, before one has had the chance to fly, only holds the human spirit back…Life ultimately means taking the responsibility to find the right answer to its problems and to fulfill the tasks which it constantly sets for each individual.”  Victor Frankl

Critical Questions for Living a Life of Constructive Optimism and Meaning.

1.   Exercise your freedom to choose your attitude

2.   Don’t work against yourself–choose positive experiences and control impulses

3.   Look at yourself from a distance–don’t take yourself so seriously; develop a good sense of humor

4.   Shift your focus of attention away from self to someone or something else (de-reflecting or detaching)

5.   Extend beyond Yourself–Servant Leader “Be a Man for Others” 

6.   Realize your need and will to have meaning in life–create a purpose to make a difference 

7.   Detect the meaning of life’s moments–Live in the “Here and Now.”

Socrates once said, “I cannot teach anybody anything, I can only make them think.” Have you ever experienced the Socratic way of teaching–asking participatative questions to challenge learners to think and discover the answers? This method gets people more involved in learning through critical thinking and makes the learning more relevant to their lives. Socratic questioning illuminates the importance of questioning in learning.  Socrates stated that questioning was the only defensible form of teaching. It illuminates the difference between systematic and fragmented thinking. It teaches us to dig beneath the surface of our ideas and not just memorize stuff for regurgitation on an exam. It teaches us the value of developing questioning minds to cultivate deep learning. The art of Socratic questioning is intimately connected with learning because the art of questioning is important to the excellence of thought. What the word “Socratic” adds to the art of questioning is depth and interest in assessing the truth or  information about others and the situations they are confronting. Other people are afraid that by asking questions they will look weak, ignorant, or unsure. They like to give the impression that they are decisive and in command of the relevant issues. They fear that asking questions might introduce uncertainty or show them as uninformed or incompetent. They like being perceived as the expert. In fact, asking questions is a sign of strength and intelligence – not a sign of weakness or uncertainty. Great leaders constantly ask questions from many different people and are well aware that they do not have all the answers. Some people are in such a hurry to get things done that they do not stop to ask questions because it might slow them down. They risk rushing headlong into the wrong actions.

As politicians, peers, friends, family members, colleagues, or managers we can check assumptions, gain more information and better understanding of the problem or opportunity by first asking questions. Start with very basic, broad questions then move to more specific areas to clarify your understanding. Open questions are excellent – they give the other person or people a chance to give broad answers and they open up the discussion . Examples of open questions are: • What obstacles keep the government from bailing out home owners? •  What are the factors that caused our recent economic melt down? • How can we reduce a further melt down of the economy? • Where does an individual or bank’s authority and responsibility end and government authority through regulation begin? • Tell me more about your personal experiences in securing a business loan? Questions for a meaningful conversation need not be scripted because as we actively listen and tune-in to responses we can spontaneously formulate more in depth or probing questions. Be patient in your responses and never interrupt the speaker. The desire to state our ideas, insights, points of view and wisdom is hard to resist. The method of asking questions to deepen our understanding and provides more clarity of the issues before identifying the root issue in making critical decisions.

Asking questions is very effective in building trust and shows your interest in the problem and the person’s point of view. A word of caution-questions maybe be perceived as an interrogation and threatening rather than as a friendly way to connect unless you show interest in the responses. Try to pose each question in a calm way and ensure that your non-verbal language is relaxed and engaging. Do not jab your index finger like the “critical parent” but try to speak with warm and welcoming hand jesters with open palms.

Try to practice asking more opened questions in conversations will make a person feel understood and indicate that you care what they have to say. Instead of telling someone what you think or immediately providing advise – ask them a question and you will be perceived as caring, open, and engaging person.

Questions help us to teach as well as to learn. If you are open to new thinking and renewal the lesson’s life offers will enhance your ability to develop and grow your mental maps. … if not you may be sleep walking through life. If it is obvious that asking questions is such a powerful way of learning why do we stop asking questions? For some people the reason is that they think that they have learned all there is to know on a subject? Others like to hear themselves talk and control conversations. Some people become bored, lazy or worn down by fighting the same battles for change year in and year out. They want to maintain their comfort level by holding onto old and tried and true “mental maps”, assumptions and solution or ideas which they believe are correct and unchanging. For example, cutting taxes leads to a strong economy. They try old solutions that might or might not fit the new circumstances.This approach leads them to be stuck in the past. And many times they end up failing by trying to maintain the status quo and their comfort level.

“In a time of drastic change it is the learners who inherit the future. The learned usually find themselves equipped to live in a world that no longer exists.”
Eric Hoffer

Let’s start with, Dr. David K. Reynolds, past Director of the To Do Institute for Constructive Living, in Los Angeles.  Dr. Reynolds has written many books such as, Playing Ball on Running Water, where he explores Morita ideas on living with attention and awareness to what is controllable and what is not in living a constructive, productive and fulfilling life.  The CL  process and principles are a blending and adaption of Eastern lifeways in Japan of Shoma Morita (Morita Therapy) and Ishin Yoshimoto ( Naikin) to Western culture. The principles of Constructive living provide the opportunity to bring control and meaning to your life through a practical and realistic life of service.  The CL method is a step-by-step process for changing thinking, understanding attitudes, beliefs, feelings and behavior, that is, how a person thinks and feels about, understands, acts and relates with themselves and others.  Every day all of us have problems and opportunities to deal with and try to resolve. The CL model is a way of understanding and approaching your problems and feelings in an enlightened and organized way so you can cope and handle them with more effectiveness and efficiency. Here are the essential components of the model:

1. Be clear on your purpose.

2. Accept and understand your feelings and emotion.

3. Do what you need to do!!!!  (sounds a bit like the Nike ads)

The process of CL highlights ways to approach and handle problems and feelings in life.  CL provides the opportunity to find methods for making better decisions and choices. CL teaches you new skills and provides powerful tools to show you how to clarify your thinking and how to act when what you are doing is not satisfying or effective for you and is causing functional life issues and negatively impacting your energy, sense of meaning and relationships with others.

In CL the individual is responsible for their choices and own behavior. Excuses, projection, denial, and blaming are confronted in a caring, yet forceful way. We do this by telling and accepting the truth in the “here and now”. Remember there are things we can control in life and things that are beyond our control. Figuring out the differences is one of the challanages of CL. The environment around us, peer pressure or situations at school, work, or home are only part of the reasons we act the way we do. Yet each person creates their own unique life by how they think and choose to behave. 

If you are a committed and a determined “seeker”,  the quality of your life has nothing to do with excuses, unresolved conflicts,  or distant negative experiences. It has everything to do with  the HERE AND NOW–YOU. YOUR ESSENCE AND PASSION FOR LIVING A MEANINGFUL, CONTROLLABLE  and CONSTRUCTIVE LIFE. It has to do with your thinking, choices, behavior, and impact–The pressing question: What is controllable and uncontrollable in your life?

 Reflection Activity: Pick one action that needs doing on a regular basis: (running or walking, eating healthy foods, self-improvement through meditation, doing the monthly bills, calling three potential clients, writing a blog, walking the dog,etc.) Chose a set time of the day and do the activity at the same time each day for one week. Record the day, time, activity and your reflections in your daily journal.

Reflection quote: “Focus on living well regardless of how you are feeling at the moment.”  Dr. David K. Reynolds

“Words are like heavy burdens for some. Like rocks or weights on your back. If birds talked they might not fly.” 

President Obama is carrying a heavy burden in trying to live up to his lofty words–Change You can believe in, Yes, we can etc and now the  Nobel Peace Prize adds to the expectations. An example of “high expectations” is Health Care Reform.  His promise during the campaign season on Universal Health has morphed many times during the last nine months.  At first, the talk was about the need and right of all Americans to Health Care through an ambitious and long over due single payer system like “Medicare for All”.  The “Single-payer” idea was thrown under the bus before it was even given a chance, then a public option to provide competition for insurance companies is being attacked by opponents as a government takeover and a Co-Op Health System was too hard to figure out. So, the latest compromise being discussed is to just let the States choose whether to adopt a public option or not. What a mess is created when there is little leadership shown on driving a simple, clear, and consistent message.  As we all know words are cheap, but action and follow-through are hard because it requires courage, risk, and an understandable message delivered over and over again.

Obama and his team seem to be ready to settle for any bill so they can  justify the time and political capital spent on this intractable problem. Maybe they need to reflect on this powerful message from Eric Hoffer, long time change philosopher and longshoremen. Hoffer said: “In human affairs every solution only sharpens the problem, to show us more clearly what we are up against, there are no FINAL SOLUTIONS.”  

President Obama the time for leadership is now. Leaders Serve Period, so no more waiting for others to carry the burden of action. You and your team must step-up, people are dying everyday. The following speech by Alan Grayson, House Rep from Florida, demonstrates the assertive and “profiles in courage” we need. Please Mr. President show this to your team and stop fiddling around. 

Power of Empathy

“The job of leadership today is not just to make money. It’s to make meaning.” John Hagel, Management Consultant

Judgment implies evaluation and a lack of trust. Trusting yourself and others is the foundation of empathy. ” Carl Rogers

Empathy defined–It is the unconditional understanding of others feelings, experience and ideas without judgment. Empathy does not mean agreement with the other persons point of view or feeling. To show empathy you must be able to put yourself in the other persons shoes and understand their experience  without judgment.

 Effective empathy has the potential to develop and deepen participants’ mindset, skillset and ability to work with others on teams, in organizations and families. Participants will learn through experiential activities to respond more effectively to the obstacles and challenges of interpersonal conversations. In essence, it uses the skills and theory of action learning with powerful empathy practice to see the possibilities of caring interactions.

 The result is a consistent ability to touch and awaken a profound ‘common ground’ for communicating and connecting with others. Participants describe experiencing dialogue and mutual understanding in ways they had not imagined or thought possible. This practice of empathizing with others, we believe, creates the possibility of successfully connecting with more openness and caring.

 The remarkable power of empathy creates an environment in which participants can experience being their authentic and best selves when interacting one-on-one and on a team. It builds trust and cooperation for the common good. It provides groups and their members with a greater ability to connect and engage the challenges they face, and to do so with authenticity and genuineness.

The defining question for any leader is this: did you leave the organization in a better place than when you found it? Sadly we have discovered that the great recession we are enduring was in part due to greedy executives who did not leave their companies better off, even though they themselves exited with pockets full of cash.

For leaders, the following exercise works well as a form of motivation and future aspiration, that is, how do I want to be remembered? Consider the following three questions to help you consider how you would sum up your work life in six words or less.

1.  What keeps me up at night or gets you up in the morning? A very basic question! What do you do that has meaning and why do you do it? For some, the answer is the opportunity to work with others on a project that has real meaning, that is, improves the quality of life for others. If you get stuck on this question, then you need to consider what you don’t like about what you do. Is it possible to change something, or must you change careers?

2.  How can I be a good steward and leave the world in a better place than I found it? We humans are motivated to work for goals greater than ourselves. Leaders achieve through the efforts of others. It is imperative that they create conditions for others to succeed. Leaders help others achieve goals that enable them, the team, and by extension the organization, to succeed.

3.  What is my impact and influence as a Leader?Position or authority over someone is a point of leverage but its effect may be limited. For organizations, particularly in challenging times with dwindling resources, leaders need to exert their influence in positive ways ( +5 to every -1 rule). Such influence is built upon creating trust, being credible and reliable by “Doing What You Say You Will Do” ( DWYSYWD), modeling good decisions and open communication.

You can adapt this exercise to fit other needs. For example, how might you describe a challenge facing your team using just a few powerful words? “Tough job. Committed people. Keep working.” Or “Need ideas. Sooner than later. Help.” You can even make a game of it at your next staff meeting. Encourage your people to contribute their six words as a means of getting to think about the issues, the challenges, and the opportunities you face.

Summing up your career in a few words may not produce an AHA moment of sudden clarity, but the exercise challenges you to think about what work means to you and how you influence the way others work. “Big idea. Profound thoughts. Truthful moment.”

  In spite of what Michael Moore says in his new documentary, capitalism is seeking a new identity by creating interactive climates which support positive social interaction.  Yet, far too often in the workplace people feel disappointed and unfulfilled because of the harsh rules and inequality they experience. Sensitive, competent, motivated individuals commonly feel stuck, underutilized and  angry by command and control bureaucracies, authoritarian management styles. They battle desperately interpersonal  conflict and abuse  in every day interactions because of the lack of an empathic environment that rewards profits over people.

“The average doctor listens for 18 seconds before interrupting the patient.”

How disrespectful and arrongant is this kind of behavior? What are the implications for doctor-patient interactions? How can we help doctors improve their communication skills?

Why is listening to patients so important?  As Dr. Nichols once said, The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and be understood. The best way to understand people is to listen to them.”  How well you listen has a major impact on your ability to connect with patients, gather information, make an accurate diagnosis, and on the quality of medical treatment. Listening is one of the most important skills a doctor can possess because it  improves your communication effectiveness, improves interpersonal relations and gives you the ability to motivate and influence patients to make good decisions for their health and well being. 

How and when do doctors listen?

• They listen to obtain information
• They listen to understand
• They listen to connect with patients
• They listen to hear what’s important to the patient
• They listen so as to clarify confusing ideas or medical jargon for patient
• They listen to learn about new medical practices and approaches for treatment
• They listen to show that they care.

Given all this listening doctors are suppose to do, you would think they would we’d be good at it! In fact they are not. Depending on the study being quoted, doctors interrupt patients and stop listening within 18 seconds of interacting with a patirnet.

Step 1. Reality check:  Assess current situation and what’s important for the patient.  Asking  a few of these questions will help you stay grounded and connected to the patient’s needs and wants. This is very important for building a trusting and open relationship. 

• What is important to you right now?
• What is currently happening in your life and health?
• Do you resent or want to change anything in the current situation?
• What are some of your current concerns? What’s worked? and Not?
• What are your goals for this session?
• What are your problems (things you have now that you would like to be rid of)?
• Given our review are their any questions or confusing ideas I can explain more fully.
• How do we create an effective and trusting dialogue?    

Step 2.   Understand self and others point of view and perspective- Demonstrate empathy through understanding and non-judgmental actions.

• How effective are you in using empathic communication skills?
•  Do you cut off or interrupt the patient? Look for talking over or talking too fast or not clarifying misunderstandings or not summarizing agreements?
• Conduct a personal inventory or a self-assessment? check things such as  listening time, length of patient interviews, your ability to tap the patients emotional response and commitment to change?        
• What message do you need to send to get the patient’s attention and check their understanding?

 Step 3.   Systematic Review of Alternatives and Options for treatment?

• Is there another doctor or trusted friend’s view you would like to explore, concerning your situation, before we proceed further?
• If you had a “magic wand to wave what would the situation look like?
• What would a perfect solution look like?
• When weighing the pros and cons of alternatives –What alternative looks best?
• What are some negative or unattended consequences you have reviewed?

 Step 4.  The Plan of Action –Make a (choice) focus 100% committment on change .       

• How to remove the blocks and tap into that information, experience in order to create the kind of relationship that is beneficial for treating illness
• What will it take for you to commit to action?
• What resistance or interferences must patient overcome?
• How will you overcome these forces to help create a better more productive relationship?  
• Are you still committed to go ahead with plans?
• What is the Plan of Action that demonstrates “Your Caring and Kindness” to the patient” ?

 In summary, the Listening-Trust-Process is a practical tool that you can use to become a more effective doctor in many different situations. The questions are merely meant as broad suggestions for opening up the dialogue?  In some cases or situations different questions may be called for to establish a meaningful and trusting relationship. You need to develop flexibility in tailoring this process to fit unique situations.  The key to success is for both you and your patient to feel comfortable to cover the most important topics on a regular basis and to be available to each other for special situations. This process will provide a simple discipline and structure for listening more effectively and improving your patient’s satisfaction with your services.

 “The ability to express an idea is well nigh as important as the idea itself.” Bernard Baruch

  A sticky message is one that’s understood by the audience or receiver, remembered, and that changes something (opinions, behaviors, values). Presentations can be either formal (keynote) or informal (Grand Rounds).  As a  doctor, when presenting or teaching, you’re on the front lines of conveying information and knowledge.  Every single time you deliver a roundtable, lunch and learn, and a dinner meeting, you’ve got to get up in front of colleagues and make ideas stick. The question you need to ask yourself–Is what do you want them to take or learn from the speech? And let’s face it, this is no easy mission. Few doctors look forward to another dinner meeting unless the wine is good and the food is first rate, they anticipate and are ready for the latest info on a new wonder drug for solving or abating the impact of a disease on their patients.

 1. Make the message tangible and relevant. Stories and examples are the critical foundation for sticky presentations. Stories provide a realistic context and hook for the audience

If you use only one tip, this is the one. The #1 mistake we’ve observed in presentations—and there is no close second—is that the message is too abstract. The presenter offers concepts and conclusions but not evidence. He talks at a high level about the big picture, but gives no concrete details that might make the big picture understandable and plausible. He may sprinkle in a few stories or examples, but they are treated like garnish. Most people communicate with, say, 3 parts exposition to 1 part example. That’s exactly backwards. In a compelling presentation, examples aren’t garnish, they’re the entrée.

A presentation is a sequence of concrete examples and stories that snap together to form a compelling argument. For instance, think of the examples that Al Gore used in his movie An Inconvenient Truth: The before and after photos of Mt. Kilimanjaro, showing the vanishing snow caps. The simulated satellite images of Manhattan flooded by rising sea levels. In Michael Moore’s Sicko, he doesn’t make conceptual points about the health care system—he makes his case through the stories of individuals, like the carpenter who accidentally cut off 2 fingers, and then had to choose which finger to reattach since he couldn’t afford to do both!

 2. Execute the 3 C’s–Make the presentation Clear, Concise and Compelling

We know many of you have to present data in your pre­sentations. But because data is pretty abstract, you should resist your temptation to lead with the data or to let the data stand alone. Which is more compelling? Saying that there are “900,000 poor adults with declining eyesight in Mumbai, and we need your help to start solving the prob­lem.” Or telling the story above about the 35-year-old weaver, and then saying, “Our research suggests that there are 900,000 stories like this, in Mumbai alone, and we need your help to start solving the problem.” Data are just summaries of thousands of stories—tell a few of those stories to help make the data meaningful.

 3. Get to the Point: Grab and Keep the Audience Attention

 The first mission of a presentation is to grab attention. And the second requirement is to keep that attention. That’s why it’s upsetting to see a speaker violate the Primacy Rule which is remembering that you have about 60 seconds to make a strong first impression. Don’t miss the opportunity by stum­bling out of the blocks with a laborious overview of what’s going to be covered and who you are. This problem is understandable. After all, we’ve all been coached to “Tell ‘em what you’re gonna tell ‘em, then tell ‘em, then tell ‘em what you told ‘em.”

 Within the 60 seconds of opening focus the audience’s attention on the challenge, opportunity or issue to be discussed. Eliminate irrelvant jokes and a slow start. Presenters like actors in the theater must be ready the moment you take the stage.

 4. Let your main points shine in the spotlight–focus on the critical 2-3 things you want them to take away.

 If you say 9-10 things, you say nothing. You probably lose you audience around # five. Remember the Magic #7 Rule concerning memory. People can only retain 5-9 chunks of information at one session. Stop flooding them with information and numbers. Stick to your MAIN POINT.. Are you giving the spotlight to your most important points? Here are two quick tests: What percentage of your speaking time is going to those points? And what percentage of your slides are dedicated to them? If you’re not spending at least half of your time and your visuals on the core of your message, you’re probably trying to accomplish too much.  

 5. Open and Authentic Communication 

One of the main reasons why people do not take the time to provide feedback is that they do not believe any action will result from the communication. Let audience members know that you have listened and that you will respond. Don’t just give lip service to support and continuous improvement. 

6. Listen, Ask and Problem Solve. Don’t Tell and Sell

  Hook them before trying to land them in the boat. Curosity and interest must come before data and content. Before your audience will value the information you’re giving, they’ve got to want it. Demand has to come before supply.  Most presenters take the audience’s desire to listen and care for granted, but that’s a big mistake. Great presentations are mysteries, not encyclopedia entries. Sticky message must be surprising,, raise curiousity and Cool.

Example of Sticky Presentations:  JFK Man on Moon, FDR Only thing to “Fear is Fear itself,” Death Panels etc. How about this one for the Dems: Why Health Care Reform–People first–Profits second 450% increase in insurance companies profits last 10 years. Enough said (Show visual chart of insurance profits and average company profits accross industries.) Tellstories of people dying ( 22/day 140 /week  460/month and 44,000/year. Highlight a few with real people telling their stories about their pain and non-responsiveness of insurance companies. Telling powerful stories is the best way to convey a sticky message that the audience understand it, we remember it, and we can retell it later. If people believe a message is credible and true, it might change attitudes or behavior permanently.

Reflecting on the uncivil discourse taking place in poltics today I wrote the following poem this morning:

The Cry for Acceptance

I’m a Person, don’t drive me away.

I’m a person, take, like me the way I am.

I’m a person, value my worth.

I’m a person, don’t drive me away.

I’m a person, don’t get too close.

I’m a person, let me remain withing my walls.

I’m person, don’t drive me away.

I’m a person, respect my differences 

I’m a person, don’t make my mistakes awful.

I’am a person, don’t drive me away

I’m person, please understand me.

I’m a person, you are a person, go away closer.

I’m person, let me be …